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Eternal Squabblers League
Final Stats and Standings 1985 thru 2025
plus various Newsletters & League Info

Scroll down to see standings in reverse cronological order
or simply click on the year below.
2021 2022 2023 2024 2025
2011 2012 2013 2014 2015 2016 2017 2018 2019 2020
2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 2009 2010
1991 1992 1993 1994 1995 1996 1997 1998 1999 2000
1985 1986 1987 1988 1989 1990

2025 ESL Summary
Drew Gallagher, 9/30/2025

The Eternal Squabblers League has existed for 41 years. Zap and Blair were not born when Caps arrived late to our alphabetical draft and drafted Steve Garvey and Dwight Gooden in quick succession. For the first 40 years, Chris had won exactly half of the championships. Now, he is batting above .500 with his 21st title in 41 years.

Once upon a time, Chris was offered a seat at a national draft because of his world-renowned excellence (before online drafting) with the agreement that I would be his co-owner which meant I would drink free beer and not make him draft ex-Red Sox. The only rub was that we had to provide airfare and hotel to get to Las Vegas players like Bruce Hurst. We were young and not independently wealthy so we passed on the opportunity to showcase Chris' greatness with the hope that we would also be preserving our young marriages.

The world will never know, but after 41 years of him kicking my ass I can attest to his greatness (although I did beat him in the ASL this year).

The 2025 season also marks the high-water mark for the team formerly known as the Baserobbers and now known as the Reservoir Dogs. In Robbie's first 14 years in the league he never cashed. Now he has cashed for the fifth season in a row and reached the lofty heights of a second-place finish. Tom Holland would be proud of the 13-year old he once knew.

Rounding out the Top 5 were the Question Marks, the Slickers, and the Beachrats who cashed and also grabbed the first overall pick in the reserve draft. Leave it to me to finish last in the first season where that pick does not get the first pick in the reserve draft. My timing is brilliant.

Final 2025 Stats and Standings
		Avg	RS	HR	RBI	SB	W	S+H	K	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	80	.2423 3	1148 10	271 7	1037 8	223 10	111 10	206 9	1770 9	3.59 8	1.223 6
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	73	.2509 6	1133 9	249 5	1060 9	201 9	102 8	228 10	1782 10	4.00 4	1.298 3
Question Marks Mark Bennett	70	.2521 8	1050 7	282 8	1061 10	180 8	71 1	190 7	1190 3	3.53 9	1.150 9
City Slickers Marty Slickers	68	.2483 4	1054 8	291 9	990 5	176 7	86 5	199 8	1473 8	3.82 6	1.201 8
Beachrats Rick Frantz	63	.2490 5	953 5	252 6	943 4	138 4	103 9	159 5	1344 5	3.50 10	1.145 10
Pottsville Maroons Matt Zappacosta	57	.2592 10	1037 6	295 10	1017 7	142 5	82 4	73 1	1168 2	3.87 5	1.221 7
Ball & Oates Jon Perkins	53.5	.2571 9	939 4	242 3.5	991 6	133 2	92 6	138 4	1456 7	3.72 7	1.241 5
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	36.5	.2386 2	898 2	242 3.5	834 2	137 3	94 7	164 6	1219 4	4.30 3	1.291 4
Scottsmen Dale Scott	34	.2517 7	919 3	189 1	840 3	166 6	80 3	90 2	1401 6	4.53 2	1.313 1
Druids Drew Gallagher	15	.2377 1	795 1	194 2	768 1	121 1	74 2	112 3	1097 1	4.60 1	1.330 2

2024 ESL Summary
Drew Gallagher, 10/02/24

We have been doing the ESL for 40 years and at no point did I imagine that a player going for 65 would be a bargain, but Rick's draft day purchase of Ohtani vaulted him to his second ESL championship and the $945 in first place money so by that measure he was a bargain and didn't even pitch this season. Congratulations to the Beach Rats on the win and on getting Shohei as pitcher and hitter next year. Not to poke at old wounds for Blair, but one has to wonder if Acuna had stayed healthy and Ohtani was the one who got hurt in April if roles might have been reversed.

The battle for second place did not end until Monday's doubleheader concluded. Robbie was mere batting average points away from catching Perk (.002) and that could have pushed him into third and possibly even second place. Robbie ended up finishing fourth, but after decades of never finishing in the money the Reservoir Dogs placed for the fourth year in a row. Robbie now has all offseason to contemplate what might have been if he had started David Peterson on Sunday against Milwaukee instead of trying to preserve his ration and sending him down to miss seven innings of one-hit ball.

Chris finished second and cashed $525. Slickers was third at $315 with Robbie cashing $210. Ball and Oates finished fifth for $105.

For those of you who cashed, please email me and let me know if you'd like PayPal or a check. Be forewarned that the mail is taking longer than once upon a time so you are dependent upon Butch to get that money to you.

I believe the Question Marks wrestled the first overall pick from my grasp by failing to get 1,000 innings but I'll let Chris do that constitutional review.

We are considering one rule change for the 2025 season (beyond someone to auctioneer other than me) and that is moving our trade deadline back to August 1 instead of the Friday after the all-star break. I'll probably forget to send a follow up email on that so feel free to reach out and cast your vote on if you are in favor of moving the trade deadline back to noon on August 1st.

Let the trading begin and, Zap, if you see any players on my team that might pry James Wood from your clutches they are all available. Thank you all for being part of one of the oldest continuing fantasy baseball leagues in the history of mankind. And what is funny is that is not hyperbole.

Final 2024 Stats and Standings
		Avg	RS	HR	RBI	SB	W	S+H	K	ERA	Ratio
Beachrats Rick Frantz	88.5	.2514 9	1131 10	292 8	1127 10	240 9.5	110 9	163 8	1777 10	3.55 8	1.227 7
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	72	.2501 6	1035 7	258 6	984 6	166 6	97 7	140 6	1634 9	3.53 9	1.149 10
City Slickers Marty Slickers	70.5	.2464 3	1001 6	306 10	1031 8	146 3.5	101 8	194 10	1421 7	3.74 7	1.194 8
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	70	.2502 7	1083 9	301 9	1078 9	143 2	115 10	158 7	1616 8	4.03 5	1.283 4
Ball & Oates Jon Perkins	54	.2507 8	1054 8	266 7	996 7	173 7	67 2	138 5	1037 2	3.95 6	1.301 2
Scottsmen Dale Scott	49.5	.2555 10	978 4	221 2.5	902 5	211 8	79 5	127 3	1392 5	4.09 4	1.300 3
Pottsville Maroons Matt Zappacosta	48	.2427 2	985 5	244 5	826 1	161 5	70 3	134 4	1146 4	3.46 10	1.152 9
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	37	.2420 1	837 2	196 1	831 2	142 1	96 6	168 9	1408 6	4.10 3	1.236 6
Question Marks Mark Bennett	31	.2485 5	938 3	221 2.5	856 3	240 9.5	71 4	111 1	994 1	4.25 1*	1.291 1*
Druids Drew Gallagher	29.5	.2475 4	819 1	223 4	892 4	146 3.5	66 1	114 2	1081 3	4.23 2	1.282 5

2023 ESL Summary
Drew Gallagher, 10/04/23

Certainly not to minimize the Slickers' fifth championship or breaking up Chris' stranglehold on ESL supremacy, but when you nail three of the top five NL MVP candidates you have positioned your squad for success. Especially when all three of them--Acuna, Freeman, Soto--remained healthy for most of the season. And if anyone wants to make a point for Mookie as MVP I'd refer you to 41 home runs, 73 stolen bases, 217 hits, .337, and 149 runs. Sure, Acuna didn't play second base but that doesn't mean he couldn't have! (And look, Mookie is one of my favorite baseball players--Chaim Bloom, your legacy is secure--but I have Acuna to win MVP at 10 to 1 odds and have a growing hatred for Jeff Passan and his definition of MVP.) Marty wins $945.00 for his efforts.

Second place came down to the final game of the season when Hunter Harvey picked up a win in relief which allowed the Maroons to tie me in wins and give him a half point which was enough to vault him into second place over the Malcontents and the $525.00 payout. I see a Hunter Harvey jersey in someone's future. Customized, it's still less than the difference between second and third place in the ESL.

Chris finished third and won $315.00. (The last time Chris finished worse than third place was in 2012...when he finished fourth.)

Druids were predicted to finish 9th or 10th by toy box after the draft (Fuck you, toy box!) and all it took to finish fourth was trading Ethan Salas and Jordan Lawlar away at the deadline. Doubt we ever hear from those two again! Fourth place pays $210.00.

After nearly 30 years of never finishing in the money, The Reservoir Dogs cashed for the third year in a row by outlasting the Scottsmen and Ball and Oates. Robbie gets $105.00 for that effort.

I'll try to get checks/Paypal out in the next few days. I know Zap and Blair are too young for Paypal and may not even know what a checkbook is. Email me your addresses and preferred method of payment when you can.

We may move draft next spring to different location to celebrate our 40th anniversary. Plus, the woman who bought Mom's house probably wouldn't make us chili or be especially comfortable with five strange men sleeping in her house.

With the first pick in the supplemental draft, Blair takes Dylan Crews...

Final 2023 Stats and Standings
		Avg	RS	HR	RBI	SB	W	S+H	K	ERA	Ratio
City Slickers Marty Slickers	86	.2641 9	1091 7	315 9	1027 6	223 10	110 9	197 9	1563 8	3.85 9	1.204 10
Pottsville Maroons Matt Zappacosta	71.5	.2652 10	1216 9	329 10	1115 9	195 9	89 6.5	88 1	1375 5	4.13 3	1.225 9
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	71	.2442 2	1218 10	288 7	1192 10	176 8	80 4	163 6	1656 9	3.97 8	1.261 7
Druids Drew Gallagher	67.5	.2453 4	994 4	227 5	1040 8	167 6	89 6.5	201 10	1393 6	3.74 10	1.227 8
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	61	.2552 7	1059 5	303 8	1026 5	129 2	108 9	172 7	1562 7	4.00 7	1.297 5
Scottsmen Dale Scott	58	.2631 8	971 3	270 4	978 4	165 4	119 10	180 8	1711 10	4.10 4	1.323 3
Ball & Oates Jon Perkins	55	.2475 6	1116 8	286 6	1031 7	169 7	72 3	150 5	1286 4	4.08 5	1.321 4
Question Marks Mark Bennett	42	.2445 3	1080 6	259 3	974 3	166 5	86 5	110 2	1147 3	4.06 6	1.261 6
Beachrats Rick Frantz	25	.2473 5	841 2	202 2	811 2	157 3	71 2	126 3	1116 2	4.41 2	1.338 2
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	13	.2416 1	713 1	188 1	696 1	104 1	61 1	133 4	1113 1	4.98 1	1.461 1

2022 ESL Summary
Drew Gallagher, 10/21/22

Sorry that this end of year write up has taken me a little while, but it took me that long to count Chris' number of ESL championships. Based upon my math, it appears that Chris won his 20th ESL championship in 2022!!!!! For perspective, twenty years is almost older than Blair and Zap! The ESL has been in existence for 38 years (I cannot imagine there are many leagues in the world that have been operating continuously as long as we have) and Chris has won more than half of the titles. But I think the bigger take away from the 2022 season is that the league existed for 36 years before the Base Robbers/Reservoir Dogs ever cashed. I understand that Robbie took a few years off in those 36 years, but he cashed with fifth place last year and now has gone back to back with a fourth place finish this year. That, my friends, is perseverance.

The Perkolators have already told me he will not be back for 2023, but I dismiss that little bit of silliness each offseason.

Chris has updated the rosters so you can see what fine keepers you have for 2023. We'll let you know the draft weekend as soon as we get Zap's schedule for 2023 to make certain he will be unable to attend in person.

Final 2022 Stats and Standings
		Avg	RS	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	K	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	88	.2456 6	1081 10	276 10	1121 10	146 10	121 10	52 6	1896 10	3.59 8	1.195 8
Beachrats Rick Frantz	76.5	.2494 7	1035 9	274 9	972 8	116 6	97 8	50 3.5	1274 6	2.97 10	1.120 10
Scottsmen Dale Scott	64	.2506 8	887 4	226 4	873 4	118 7	85 5	72 10	1262 4	3.32 9	1.152 9
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	62	.2447 5	1024 6.5	273 8	1053 9	107 4	90 6.5	60 8	1488 7	3.78 5	1.262 3
City Slickers Marty Slickers	60	.2407 3	1006 5	272 7	879 5	133 9	90 6.5	50 3.5	1588 8	3.61 7	1.200 6
Question Marks Mark Bennett	58	.2513 9	1034 8	225 3	920 6	124 8	70 3	52 6	1273 5	3.75 6	1.240 5
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	57.5	.2411 4	1024 6.5	256 6	953 7	96 3	104 9	52 6	1627 9	4.10 3	1.257 4
Pottsville Maroons Matt Zappacosta	45	.2382 2	859 3	235 5	831 3	111 5	73 4	62 9	1102 3	3.90 4	1.200 7
Druids Drew Gallagher	24	.2523 10	786 2	182 2	757 2	78 2	50 1	39 1	972 2	4.31 1	1.304 1
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	12	.2302 1	637 1	174 1	649 1	64 1	55 2	49 2	943 1	4.49 1	1.317 1

Final 2021 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	68	.2558 7	362 10	1171 10	140 9	91 7	81 10	3.77 7	1.196 8
City Slickers Marty Slickers	55	.2570 9	300 9	1028 9	131 8	69 3	36 4	3.98 4	1.196 9
Scottsmen Dale Scott	53	.2519 5	211 2	810 2	115 7	106 9	67 8	3.65 10	1.181 10
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	52	.2483 3	287 8	999 8	107 6	73 4	79 9	3.66 9	1.210 5
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	50	.2942 4	261 6	940 6	94 5	108 10	66 7	3.74 8	1.235 4
Beachrats Rick Frantz	47	.2619 10	264 7	961 7	146 10	61 2	33 2	4.14 2	1.206 7
Question Marks Mark Bennett	36	.2567 8	249 3	913 5	59 1	85 5	51 5	3.79 6	1.251 3
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	35	.2425 2	256 5	874 3	91 4	87 6	61 6	4.03 3	1.209 6
Druids Drew Gallagher	34	.2539 6	254 4	877 4	67 2	93 8	35 3	3.80 5	1.267 2
Pottsville Maroons Matt Zappacosta	10	.2375 1	181 1	638 1	68 3	42 1	26 1	4.30 1	1.305 1

ESL...History Made
Drew Gallagher, 9/28/20

The season ended yesterday and with standings that were tight up until the final game. The Malcontents edged out The Beachrats to claim their 17th title in 36 years. Two other achievements, however, overshadow Chris� return to the top. The Reservoir Dogs, with a loaded pitching staff, missed out on cashing for the 14th time (the number of years he has played) but the biggest landmark was Matt setting a new mark in futility with 9 points (he edged out Robbie in batting average to avoid 8 points). Two prior owners had managed 10 points but no one in the 36-year history of the league had ever had less than 10 points until the Pottsville Maroons came in with 9 this season. The prior mark had been held by the Chuck N Ducks and The Reading Wretches so Matt beat out some pretty heady company for the honor. With that last place finish, Matt gets the first pick in the reserve draft next spring.

I know this was a bizarre season all around and drafting remotely was less than ideal but hopefully in 2021 we�ll have a full season of baseball and might be able to eat, drink and be merry together next spring.

Hope everyone stays healthy and please let us know if you do not plan on returning. Chris will update the contracts in the near future. And for those of you looking for a reason to get excited about 2021, Victor Caratini will be back in the draft!

Final 2020 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	65	.2384 3	138 9	443 9	40 6	42 10	29 10	3.53 9	1.188 9
Beachrats Rick Frantz	63	.2608 10	131 7	410 7.5	33 5	39 8.5	14 5	3.46 10	1.154 10
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	54	.2525 7	125 6	410 7.5	64 10	39 8.5	7 2	3.82 7	1.275 6
Druids Drew Gallagher	52	.2588 9	93 4	390 5	45 7	31 7	23 7	4.11 6	1.255 7
Question Marks Mark Bennett	47.5	.2460 5	112 5	391 6	30 3	29 4.5	25 8	3.78 8	1.252 8
City Slickers Marty Slickers	46.5	.2455 4	132 8	389 4	54 9	29 4.5	28 9	4.19 5	1.331 3
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	43	.2506 6	140 10	452 10	30 3	30 6	13 4	4.98 2	1.395 2
Scottsmen Dale Scott	38	.2578 8	84 3	344 3	53 8	25 3	15 6	4.67 3	1.309 4
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	22	.2343 1	81 2	305 2	30 3	24 2	9 3	4.34 4	1.278 5
Pottsville Maroons Matt Zappacosta	9	.2372 2	48 1	213 1	15 1	18 1	1 1	5.41 1	1.427 1

End of Season #35
Drew Gallagher, 9/30/19

As you will notice, I have combined the end of year missive for both the ASL and ESL. To some degree out of laziness but to a greater degree because writing about fantasy baseball with the passing of my father so fresh is painful and difficult. I do not want to minimize what The Bombers and Rick achieved (well, I am getting a little sick of the Bombers) but this year I�m going to forego the customary season in review and share with you why fantasy baseball is so connected to my father. (It is a story that many of you have heard before so you can skip it as you see fit.)

It had to be in February or March of 1985 that my Dad came home from work and had a green book that he thought I might be interested in. It was the original book of rotisserie baseball that Drago had told him about. I was sitting on my bed when Dad came into my room and gave me the book. I sat there in my room for the rest of the evening reading about this magical game of rotisserie baseball. I already knew Drago because we had been playing pickup football together for a few years and he had asked my father if I might be interested in joining a league that he was forming with a few friends from college and a few colleagues from the paper. I do not remember the entrance fee but I do know that my father footed that entrance fee for the first few years of the ASL. I was only 15 years old at that first draft (younger than my son is now) so Dad drove me to the draft at Drago�s apartment. No one knew exactly what to expect from a rotisserie draft in 1985 and I do not know if my father had intended to run into the newspaper office to work while we drafted but someone recognized that an auction draft needed an auctioneer and my father filled that role on that day. It was a role he filled for over 30 years. There was a lot of father-son bonding that went on in those car rides to and from the draft and they trigger a lot of fond memories for me. One offshoot from memories with my father was going to a Reading Phillies game with him and they were playing the Canton-Akron Indians which had to be in 1982 or 1983. The Indians had a stud shortstop named Pat Tabler and after the game when Tabler was jogging off the field my father called to him and asked him to sign a foul ball he had caught during that game. I still have that autographed ball and Pat Tabler cost me $1 in the first rotisserie auction and was one of my few keepers for the 1986 team. (It took me a little while to catch onto the nuances of fantasy baseball and some would argue, convincingly, that I am still trying to catch onto the nuances of it.) Fantasy baseball was magic to my 15-year old world and a few months later I talked to some friends in our neighborhood about it (Chris Malinowski, Robbie Miller and Mike Capilo among them) and we decided to form the Eternal Squabblers League at the all-star break. Having two rotisserie leagues that have run for 35 years consecutively is, I think, pretty special and unique.

Many years ago, my father joined the ESL and drafting against your father presented a different dynamic to the draft. It�s hard to swear at the man who gave you life just because he outbid you for Brandon Nimmo when his wife is a staunch Mets fan. We have drafted the ESL at my parents� house for over 30 years and it is going to be difficult to walk in next spring and not have my Dad there and not have him drafting against me. I think we had hoped that one day my son too would join the league and we�d have three generations of Gallagher competing against one another. My father finished 9th in the ESL this year and I finished 10th. Somehow that seems fitting and memorable to me.

My father was a huge Phillies fan and someone on local TV joked that Dad had been sick for a little while (they termed it �out on assignment�) but what may have finally killed him was this Phillies season. When I was a substitute batboy for the Reading Phillies my Dad had the Eagle photographer take a picture of me outside the dugout when Reading was playing the big club. Mike Schmidt is stretching in the background of the photo and years later Drago had Schmidt sign the photo for me. It is still on my parents wall at home.

A number of you have reached out with your condolences and I do appreciate that. Right now, fantasy baseball is a bittersweet memory of the man who raised me, coached me, and ultimately led me to fantasy baseball and the dozens of friendships that have arisen out of playing and the number that have been cemented and strengthened through this silly little game.

Truthfully, I don�t know that I�ll get your checks to you this week, but I promise that I will get them out shortly and before Scott Winterburn would have paid you. My father enjoyed seeing many of you even if it was only once a year. He enjoyed the camaraderie and seeing a room full of grown men participating in a game that was born of the game of baseball that he so loved.

Final 2019 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Beachrats Rick Frantz	66	.2794 10	333 7	1160 10	155 10	105 8	16 1	3.62 10	1.175 10
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	65	.2575 4	354 10	1143 9	114 7	111 10	104 10	4.16 7	1.244 8
City Slickers Marty Slickers	62	.2607 6	338 8	1137 8	130 9	89 5	75 8	3.75 9	1.200 9
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	49	.2621 8	327 6	1018 5	124 8	103 7	30 3	4.20 6	1.268 6
Scottsmen Dale Scott	49	.2689 9	339 9	1109 7	106 5	74 4	51 6	4.31 4	1.278 5
Question Marks Mark Bennett	48	.2603 5	312 4	1035 6	110 6	73 3	77 9	4.14 8	1.266 7
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	30	.2375 1	253 3	864 2	74 2	108 9	63 7	4.33 2	1.296 4
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	28	.2613 7	314 5	943 4	101 4	71 2	28 2	4.32 3	1.344 1
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher	27.5	.2535 3	248 2	921 3	63 1	93 6	42 4.5	4.29 5	1.341 3
Druids Drew Gallagher	15.5	.2529 2	235 1	760 1	79 3	52 1	42 2	4.40 1	1.343 2

Slickers Mini-Dynasty?
Drew Gallagher, 10/02/18

With the end of the ESL season, I prepared to write of how there is a new dynasty in the ESL and its name is the City Slickers. After all, the Slickers have placed in the money each of the past six years and finished first three times in that span. They also have Ronald Acuna and Luis Soto who are generational talents and will likely be Slickers for years to come. In short, future titles are probable if not even likely (and this pisses Mal off to no end even though he hasn�t been in the league since 2014). So I started to do a little bit of research and what I uncovered is truly remarkable and wasn�t something that I was aware of�Chris Malinowski�s team has finished in the money for 34 years in a row! (The streak would likely be longer except for the fact that we only started the league 34 years ago.) Every year of the ESL�s existence, The Cool Beans or Malcontents have finished in the money. Even in our abbreviated first season in 1985 which was less than 80 games, The Cool Beans finished third behind Menet Work and The Hardbodies. (And for you Penn State fans out there, our first ESL champion was indeed Scott Menet who is the uncle of Penn State�s center.) Thirty four years in a row�Chris was winning money in the ESL before Blair was even born! [CORRECTION FROM EDITOR TOM HOLLAND: The Cool Beans finished 5th in 1986. At that time, 5th place did not get paid, so actually Chris only finished "in the money" 32 years in a row, and 33 out of 34.]

(Another stat that I stopped researching when it started to become obvious that it was so is that I believe my team has finished last more often than any other team

in league history but since Chris and I are the only teams that have been in the league continuously for nearly three and a half decades�oh, screw it, there is no context that makes that seem less terrible.)

So one could argue that the rest of us, at least until Acuna and Soto reach their late 20s in a decade, are playing for third place. However, third place did pay $315.00 so that�s nearly a $100.00 profit on your entrance fee. And take heart, I finished first in 2015, Caps finished first in 2014, Rick finished first in 2013, and Dale finished first in 2011. And going back to 2007 and 2008, Perk won back to back titles and just missed out on a threepeat with a second place finish.

Couple of notes on those final standings. This is Blair�s highest finish since he joined the league four years ago. Feed the Puig is going to undergo a name change unless Rick drafts Puig again since his contract is, finally, up. I�m guessing the new team name is going to feature Trea Turner in some fashion.

The honor of the next Ronald Acuna in the reserve draft goes to The Colonoscopies followed by The Question Marks, Chuck and Duck, Sloppy Second Basemen and then the Reservoir Dogs who are considering changing their name to �Marty, I am not trading you Walker Buehler so don�t even ask.�

Looking forward to year 35 next year. Pretty remarkable that four of the original 10 are still in the fold!

Final 2018 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
City Slickers Marty Slickers	69	.2666 10	321 10	1050 10	112 5	96 8	89 10	3.46 9	1.234 7
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	59	.2624 7	270 8	999 8	95 4	122 10	71 8	3.71 6	1.223 8
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	55	.2577 5	244 4	888 4	132 8	120 9	84 9	3.62 7	1.193 9
Feed the Puig Rick Frantz	54	.2653 9	272 9	1031 9	181 10	78 5	42 3	4.03 4	1.256 5
Druids Drew Gallagher	49.5	.2489 3	269 7	953 6	120 6	87 6	40 1.5	3.43 10	1.178 10
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	45	.2501 4	255 6	987 7	136 9	91 7	49 6	4.08 3	1.286 3
Sloppy 2nd-Basemen Mike Capilo	36	.2485 2	251 5	888 4	93 3	73 4	47 4	3.61 8	1.241 6
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher	28	.2653 8	216 3	888 4	55 1	67 2	62 7	4.43 1	1.320 2
Question Marks Mark Bennett	27	.2580 6	211 2	782 2	87 2	58 1	48 5	3.82 5	1.260 4
Colonoscopies Dale Scott	17.5	.2405 1	171 1	669 1	131 7	68 3	40 1.5	4.11 2	1.342 1

End of Year Summation
Drew Gallagher, 10/03/17

Fall is my wife�s favorite season. However, when I go to the bank and start writing checks to people other than myself the foliage starts to lose part of its attraction. This time every year there is a part of my wife that wishes she was married to Chris because he usually gets a big check (provided he doesn�t lose it). Although I have not gone on the web site (www.yourpalchrismal.com) to confirm it, I have to believe that Chris� 77 total points is an ESL record. Do the math, there were three points total that he did not get for 2017. And while that is impressive and might be a bit daunting (Caps could have a lot of fun with that line), take comfort in the fact that a vast majority of Chris� roster is gone for 2018 including our final Astro holdout�George Springer. Rick, who held on for 4th place, already feels that 2018 will be his year and might need to change his team name to something that puts Trea Turner on the plateau he so richly deserves. (Believe it or not, I think he has Puig for another year!) Menage a Trea works for me.

Speed will be available in next spring�s draft since both Dee Gordon and Billy Hamilton are back in. Rick should bid on both of them.

Caps gets the first pick in the reserve draft and hopefully takes next year�s Cody Bellinger instead of next year�s Lewis Brinson. Maybe Brinson will be traded back to an American League team now that the Brewers have a ton of outfield depth. I�m a genius.

Marty finished in second place but he�s going to need to plug the holes left by Giancarlo and Charlie Blackmon (Geez, the 2018 draft is looking deep already).

The Chuck N Ducks registered their highest finish ever by coming in third based almost solely on a pitching staff that Chucked but rarely Ducked. Like the two owners above him, he�s going to have to replace some valuable pieces in Tommy Pham and Ender Inciarte (more speed in the draft).

Rick finished 4th and can actually extend Trea Turner for 51 years according to my long division, but he would have to get rid of Puig and any other player who was not $1.

Dale finished 5th, denying me a shot at a payday. (My wife already likes him better than me.) My hunch is that the 43 points for 5th place is one of the lowest point totals ever for a money position but that is a byproduct of a team finishing with 77 points! He loses Tony Two Bags for 2018 (again, a hanging curveball for Caps). Also guessing that he cuts ties with Starling �Just Say No� Marte (more speed in the 2018 draft).

Blair has Rhys Hoskins so nothing else in the world matters. Get that man a bobblehead!

Robbie has Scooter Gennett (.295, 27 homers and 97 RBIs). How on earth did that happen? Perhaps what is more impressive is that Robbie kept him.

[Payouts] will be mailed after I get to the bank and field another round of questions as to why I never win. It�s great fun. Really.

I assume all owners will be returning for 2018, but if that changes please let me know and I�ll laugh at you for thinking that decision is yours.

Final 2017 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	77	.2674 8	388 10	1250 10	193 10	103 10	75 9	3.75 10	1.250 10
City Slickers Marty Slickers	55.5	.2665 7	344 9	1041 8	113 6	82 4.5	66 5	3.95 8	1.274 8
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher	49.5	.2702 10	231 4	924 4	94 3.5	98 9	35 3	3.82 9	1.281 7
Feed the Puig Rick Frantz	44	.2641 5	299 7	1038 7	191 9	73 1	50 4	4.00 6	1.330 5
Scottsmen Dale Scott	43	.2652 6	220 2	818 3	78 2	97 8	68 6	3.99 7	1.263 9
Druids Drew Gallagher	42	.2602 3	309 8	1082 9	114 7	75 2	31 2	4.06 5	1.284 6
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	42	.2617 4	287 6	952 5	96 5	93 7	107 10	4.64 2	1.363 3
Question Marks Mark Bennett	34.5	.2700 9	221 3	749 2	70 1	82 4.5	69 7	4.42 4	1.341 4
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	33	.2563 1	278 5	1027 6	131 8	76 3	70 8	4.71 1	1.417 1
Sloppy 2nd-Basemen Mike Capilo	19.5	.2597 2	165 1	652 1	94 3.5	85 6	4 1	4.44 3	1.387 2

Congratulations to Slickers!
Drew Gallagher, 10/04/16

Well, the roto gods smiled on Marty in 2016. No reversed trades at the deadline, and a first place finish. The Question Marks, with just over a week to go, looked to be zeroing in on a title when everyone of Marty�s pitchers got two wins over the last week of the season and he leapfrogged a number of teams in the wins category to finish in first.

I would like to again offer up this simple draft day advice: drafting in a room with both your father and son on a different team is not ideal. Drafting next to Robbie, high on cough medicine, also does not appear to be ideal.

Worst luck of the season was an easy one in 2016�Chuck N Ducks landing AJ Pollack mere hours before he essentially was lost for the season. No draft strategy or free agent pickup can compensate for that loss before the season starts.

Hope everyone will be returning for 2017 and let the trading begin!

Final 2016 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
City Slickers Marty Slickers	65	.2638 6	312 10	1077 10	116 3	93 9	99 9	3.36 9	1.215 9
Question Marks Mark Bennett	63	.2694 8	243 6	1012 8	133 5	92 8	86 8	3.34 10	1.212 10
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	56.5	.2678 7	296 8	1034 9	150 8	88 5.5	119 10	3.95 5	1.290 4
Scottsmen Dale Scott	55	.2752 10	239 5	960 4	165 10	87 4	65 7	3.71 7	1.225 8
Sloppy 2nd-Basemen Mike Capilo	43.5	.2555 4	291 7	1000 6	138 6	88 5.5	57 6	4.14 4	1.278 5
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	38.5	.2606 5	232 4	966 5	142 7	105 10	27 1.5	4.35 3	1.365 3
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	35.5	.2707 9	298 9	1010 7	131 4	81 3	27 1.5	4.76 1	1.389 1
Feed the Puig Rick Frantz	33	.2539 3	179 1	653 1	164 9	59 1	29 3	3.69 8	1.240 7
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher	31	.2526 2	188 3	727 2	69 1	89 7	30 1	3.87 6	1.259 6
Druids Drew Gallagher	19	.2511 1	182 2	741 3	88 2	70 2	47 5	4.52 2	1.381 2

Break Up the Dynasty
Drew Gallagher, 10/05/15

Yes, they are starting to use the D word in the land of the Druids (and no, Caps, not Dickhead) after clinching their third title in 31 years in a worst to first one year turnaround! Former Druid player and current Druid manager for life, Tim Wallach, couldn�t help but dream between sips of the cheapest champagne they have at Giant.

�It�s hard not to compare this squad to some of those old Yankee teams,� said an ebullient Wallach. �But then again, I�m pretty drunk.�

Amid the locker room celebration, there was one player noticeably absent from the festivities and Wallach was quite candid about his absence.

�Yeah, Casey Janssen�s not here. The players took a vote and said he had to sit in the hallway if we won the pennant. I mean come on, the guy practically handed the Slickers the championship every time he came on in relief. He should get a portion of the Slickers� second place money. We got Kershaw, Cole and Lester pitching their asses off down the stretch and that buffoon could undo a Kershaw line by facing just three batters. The GM missed on that one. Case was easily our Least Valuable Player. What a dick.�

Wallach, however, was quick to praise the GM for picking up Justin Bour: �Is his first name Justin? I really have no idea since I would simply see Bour in the box score. He should change his name to Jason Bourne though. What a freaking stud. Can�t believe he�s not on Malinowski�s team frankly. He must�ve been on vacation that Sunday or doing laundry to get bird crap off his shirt.

When asked about the possibilities of repeating in 2016 Wallach became philosophical or was just simply slurring a little less.

�Look Perk went back to back and that was more improbable than the Astros making the playoffs or Trent Dilfer winning a Super Bowl or Ric Ocasik marrying a super model. If Perk could do it so can we. Although not having Kershaw pitching every fifth day might be a problem. Where is Kersh by the way? Is the owner still holding him in a bear hug and kissing him? Geez, someone tell the owner to put his clothes back on. I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth.�

So two original owners have now gone back to back so there is hope for the Reservoir Dogs in 2016 since Chris now only finishes third. Congratulations to Marty on second place even though we screwed him out of Ryan Zimmerman for the few weeks he was healthy. I�m afraid to do the calculations, but I hope Zimm would not have made up the five-point difference in the standings.

And of particular note is the finish of The Blair Pitch Project in their first season in the league! They took Kris Bryant and a bunch of other non-keepers that caused Mal and Perk to quit the league and somehow, improbably, cashed. Rumor is that the $105.00 in winnings is going to a papier mache likeness of Kris Bryant that he will take everywhere with him. It�s unfortunate that he doesn�t get to keep Bryant next year�(just screwing with you Blair).

I�ll be sending out the checks sometime in the near future after I get to the bank and pay off some gambling debts so send me your addresses and I�ll get them to you before Winterburn would have. If for some reason, you are not planning on returning to the league please let me know so I can smack you around and then try to find a replacement if Tom Holland is unavailable.

Final 2015 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Druids Drew Gallagher	62.5	.2659 8	232 6	999 10	141 8	85 5.5	61 2	3.33 10	1.181 9
City Slickers Marty Slickers	58	.2591 3	239 9.5	897 6	104 2.5	102 9	91 9	3.35 9	1.164 10
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	54.5	.2610 4	236 8	947 9	227 10	85 5.5	150 10	3.64 5	1.292 3
Question Marks Mark Bennett	53	.2616 5	209 4	886 5	154 9	89 7	70 7	3.42 8	1.218 8
Blair Pitch Project Blair DeWalt	49	.2693 9	234 7	933 8	127 6	106 10	44 4	3.99 3	1.327 2
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher	44.5	.2702 10	239 9.5	906 7	85 1	72 2	35 3	3.52 7	1.254 5
Reservoir Dogs Rob Miller	42	.2648 6	228 5	882 4	107 5	101 8	74 8	4.01 2	1.284 4
Scottsmen Dale Scott	32.5	.2587 2	193 3	817 3	104 2.5	82 4	48 5	3.61 6	1.227 7
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	26	.2584 1	166 2	666 1	132 7	75 3	29 2	3.68 4	1.232 6
Feed the Puig Rick Frantz	18	.2658 7	159 1	735 2	105 4	59 1	13 1	3.81 1*	1.274 1*

Final 2014 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	69	.2824 10	191 7	832 6	186 9	128 10	81 7	2.98 10	1.122 10
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	63	.2525 3	236 9	951 9	230 10	115 9	133 10	3.37 7	1.215 6
Question Marks Mark Bennett	57.5	.2599 7	181 4.5	846 8	143 8	115 9	133 10	3.37 7	1.215 6
City Slickers Marty Slickers	53	.2571 5	242 10	1051 10	136 7	92 7	55 5	3.55 5	1.266 4
The Simons Mal Maher	52	.2674 9	162 3	711 3	122 5	89 6	102 9	3.19 8	1.167 9
Scottsmen Dale Scott	49	.2571 6	205 8	838 7	120 4	110 8	32 3	3.44 6	1.196 7
Feed the Puig Rick Frantz	41.5	.2671 8	181 4.5	819 5	124 6	65 3	74 6	3.62 4	1.257 5
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher	22	.2516 2	189 6	722 4	87 2	62 2	26 2	3.86 2	1.328 2
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	21.5	.2549 4	161 2	692 2	87 2	73 4	42 4	4.16 1	1.361 1
Druids Drew Gallagher	13	.2507 1	154 1	680 1	87 2	57 1	4 1	3.83 3	1.316 3

King Richard I
Drew Gallagher, 10/11/13

Gentlemen:

Not for the first time, the ESL mirrored Major League baseball in some ways. Oddsmakers made Mal�s team the heavy early, middle and late favorite to win the ESL. His young Nationals� talent would equal or out produce their counterparts in Washington. Well, they did equal the Strasburg and Harper Nats, but that was only good enough for second place as Rick passed him on the strength of a Henderson Alvarez no-hitter on the final day to take first place and his first-ever ESL crown. Mal�s season was marred by injuries and 2014 is already falling into the same predictable pattern as Matt Harvey has already been declared out for the season.

The top-5 was rounded out by Chris, Jamie and Marty. I finished ahead of my father which won me a case of beer, but it�s going to take more than that to get over Matt Kemp for the second year in a row.

Drew Gallagher

Final 2013 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Feed the Puig Rick Frantz	65.5	.2679 10	243 8.5	980 9	101 4	100 9	60 5	3.23 10	1.184 10
The Simons Mal Maher	64.5	.2711 8	243 8.5	990 10	138 6	92 7	86 9	3.36 9	1.214 7
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	60	.2578 5	200 5	806 6	172 10	114 10	78 7	3.41 8	1.204 9
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	57	.2753 9	212 7	915 7	140 7	93 8	74 6	3.51 7	1.231 6
City Slickers Marty Slickers	50	.2586 7	247 10	974 8	148 9	86 5	58 4	3.75 3	1.241 4
Question Marks Mark Bennett	41	.2520 3	175 3	721 3	80 2	90 6	91 10	3.67 6	1.212 8
Druids Drew Gallagher	33	.2582 6	186 4	785 5	146 8	70 2	27 3	3.81 2	1.272 3
Scottsmen Dale Scott	31	.2507 2	202 6	736 4	111 5	83 3	82 8	3.99 1	1.322 2
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher	22	.2499 1	153 2	626 1	82 3	84 4	14 2	3.72 4	1.238 5
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	16	.2556 4	152 1	681 2	74 1	69 1	12 1	3.69 5	1.343 1

Final 2012 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
City Slickers Marty Slickers	65	.2733 9	238 7	1009 10	158 5	105 9	110 10	3.74 6	1.230 9
Question Marks Mark Bennett	60	.2680 8	239 8	943 5	176 6	99 7	71 6	3.49 10	1.213 10
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	55.5	.2750 10	260 10	999 9	224 9	94 4.5	100 8	4.04 2	1.302 3
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	47	.2573 2	244 9	952 7	185 7	91 3	93 7	3.72 7	1.272 5
The Simons Mal Maher Ellen Gallagher	47	.2637 5	231 6	980 8	238 10	97 6	61 5	3.87 3	1.282 5
Druids Drew Gallagher	45	.2467 1	221 4	905 4	191 8	106 10	24 2	3.68 8	1.239 8
Scottsmen Dale Scott	41.5	.2631 4	187 3	775 2	116 3	94 4.5	101 9	3.68 9	1.250 7
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	38	.2653 6	227 5	945 6	138 4	101 8	32 3	3.79 4	1.302 2
Beachrats Rick Frantz	31	.2673 7	175 2	848 3	93 2	71 2	54 4	3.75 5	1.272 6
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher	10	.2605 3	163 1	683 1	81 1	69 1	1 1	4.31 1	1.378 1

Great Scottsmen
Drew Gallagher, 9/30/11

Gentlemen:

The 27th year of the ESL has wrapped up and with it we are crowning our ninth different champion in Dale King Scott. The championship was well-deserved despite the troubling decision to start Brett Myers on the final day of the season. But for that, the Question Marks are eternally grateful and, in all probability, so should our Pal. Myers� atrocious outing (well documented for Phillie fans) allowed both Mark and Chris to pass Dale in ERA on the final day. That coupled with my team�s remarkable 4 for 48 effort on the final day allowed the Question Marks to leap into a three-way tie for third place which, I believe, is unprecedented in the history of the league. So without further adieu I take you to the Scottsmen�s press conference and locker room celebration.

Dale Scott walks to the podium wearing nothing but Ryan Braun boxer shorts.

Reporter: �Dale, didn�t bring a change of clothes for post celebration?�

Dale: �What? Oh, you mean the outfit? No, I usually wear just underwear around the clubhouse. Shoot if I had been drinking champagne instead of Dale�s Pale Ale I�d probably be naked right now.�

(Sound of many journalists throwing up a little bit in their mouths.)

Reporter: �So how does it feel to finally win after all of these years?�

Dale: �Well first I�d like to thank my lord and savior, Ryan Braun. Water into wine? Try hitting 33 bombs and stealing 33 bases. You�re not going to find those types of numbers in Corinthians. Parting the Red Sea? Pretty cool but not as cool as fucking Bernie Brewer coming down the slide!�

Reporter: ̶ 0;Speaking of Braun, he�s going back into the draft next season. Is there any scenario you can envision where he is not a Scottsmen?�

Dale: �No.�

Reporter: �Seriously? I mean, unless Mal flies off to South Africa again next year to miss the World Cup, you don�t envision him trying to screw you on Braun by opening the bidding at, say, 65?�

Dale: �I stand by my prior response. No. My face will turn bright red and I�ll bid 66. Might be best if Mal just stays home again this year.�

Reporter: �You really think any player is worth that kind of money after the flame out failures of Pujols and Hanley this season?�

Dale: �I didn�t say Braun was worth 66. I think he�s worth more than that and will bid more if necessary. Look, I�ll put this into perspective for you guys. My only daughter is going off to college next year. She is the light of my life and I�ll be devastated when she leaves home. But the sadness I�ll feel at my daughter�s departure doesn�t eve n compare to Brauny leaving. If he leaves, a part of me dies. And I mean a good part like my penis.�

So will 2012 bring our 10th different champion? The morning line has Mal�s squad as the current favorites. He has amassed a list of keepers as deep as any in recent memory. Only problem is that he will likely trade most of those keepers before Thanksgiving--at least those not named Bryce Harper. (At this point I�d like to interject that Marty said that Bryce Harper couldn�t carry Kyle Blanks� jockstrap.)

Payouts were $934.20 to Dale, $519.00 to your s truly and $207.60 each to Chris, Mark and Jamie.

The offseason has now begun for those of us who are Red Sox fans. The talent again appears to be well spread throughout the 10 ESL teams. And for those who might be looking for that oh so rare blend of speed, power and batting average my sources tell me that there is a kid by the name of Braun who will be there for the taking in April. Just be prepared to say 67.

Final 2011 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Scottsmen Dale Scott	63	.2826 10	233 7	986 8	171 7	106 9	89 6	3.46 8	1.238 8
Druids Drew Gallagher	59.5	.2615 6	278 10	1100 10	185 9	83 5.5	92 8	3.55 7	1.289 4
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	57	.2485 1	237 8	956 7	126 3	111 10	95 9	3.45 9	1.227 10
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	57	.2597 5	239 9	1016 9	202 10	82 4	103 10	3.65 5	1.282 5
Question Marks Mark Bennett	57	.2618 7	212 5	922 6	177 8	103 8	90 7	3.43 10	1.264 6
Beachrats Rick Frantz	46	.2592 4	216 6	894 5	152 4	95 7	85 5	3.58 6	1.230 9
City Slickers Marty Slickers	34.5	.2734 9	158 3	708 3	113 2	83 5.5	8 1	3.73 4	1.252 7
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	25	.2511 2	190 4	834 4	158 5	69 1	51 4	3.99 2	1.304 3
The Simons Mal Maher Ellen Gallagher	21	.2516 3	136 2	598 1	159 6	80 2	9 2	3.77 3	1.319 2
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher Tom Gallagher	20	.2627 8	135 1	683 2	71 1	81 3	34 3	4.23 1	1.357 1

Beach Rats Press Release
Drew Gallagher, 11/30/10

November, 30, 2010__Fredericksburg, VA: In response to the Rockies� signing of Troy Tulowitzki to a 10-year contract, Beachrats� owner Rick Franz had this to say: �Look, I�ll be bidding on Tulo like everyone else at the draft, but 10 years is just a down payment on the kind of contract we are talking with CarGo.�

Speculation has run rampant this offseason that Carlos Gonzalez was going to get the longest contract ever handed out in the ESL, but after this morning�s comments from Franz some salary cap experts have

started to calculate how many years Franz could go and still field a team around him. If Franz wants to retain some talent to go with CarGo the general thinking is that he could go 38 years and make him $200.

Jamie has contacted onroto to see if there is a way to show a salary that will, essentially, have to double up on the alphabet. �We hope to hear from onroto in the next few days,� Schlesinger said.

We will continue to follow this story through roster freeze deadline in March.

End of Season Report
Drew Gallagher, 10/05/10

Gentlemen,

Come every October the leaves begin to change color and the Virginia Tech Hokies lose to a team they shouldn�t have. Another autumnal rite of passage is the Malcontents atop the ESL. For the 15th time in 26 seasons, Chris cashed the winner�s check and thanks to a switch in stat services it is the largest prize payout ever at $922.50. Both of his girls might now be able to go to college.

Jamie had built his team for 2010 and it almost paid off as the race wound down but ultimately Chris prevailed by a rather wide margin. Congratulations to the Scottsmen for finishing third and The Slickers for finishing 4th. The Beach Rats rounded out the money spots by finishing 5th.

In setting a precedent I hope to never repeat the Druids finished last for the second year in a row. What is remarkable about that finish is that Richie Weeks, Scott Rolen and Jay Bruce all had phenomenally productive years. So what exactly happened?

Manager for Life, Tim Wallach, had this observation: �Look, we needed more money to make this team competitive but instead of going out and spending it management decided that a $10 million gold statue at the entrance to Druid Park was more important. That statue, much like its real life counterpart, couldn�t go out and pitch every fifth day so we�re stuck with Zach Duke, Randy Wells and John Lannan on the bump. That statue, like Matt Gamel and Kyle Blanks, couldn�t play the field so we�ve got Jody Gerut getting meaningful at bats. It�s a travesty. This is the organization that once upon a time drafted Barry Bonds as a minor leaguer and now we�re getting looks at Ryan Rohlinger in June.�

If Wallach is looking for a reason for optimism he can take heart in the names that will be entering this year�s draft:

Justin Upton, Chris Young, Troy Tulowitzki, Hanley Ramirez (*--see 2 below), Corey Hart, Heath Bell, Albert Pujols, Adrian Gonzalez, Brandon Phillips, Prince Fielder to name a few.

Other things to look for in the offseason:

1. The Beach Rats are contemplating making Carlos Gonzalez the first $100 dollar man. He would become the first L18 in the history of the ESL.

2. The Toilets searching the ESL constitution for language that may allow them to extend Hanley Ramirez despite his L1 status.

3. A bunch of really bad teams heading into 2011. The talent appears to be spread thin throughout the league with the possible exception of Chris� pitching staff and Dale�s stranglehold on Padre middle relievers.

4. A grandfather who really loves his grandson in the Chuck N Ducks building their squad around Kung Fu Panda which my son thinks is pretty cool.

5. Mal jetting off to California to hook up with Rihanna. From Mal: �Yes, I�m a married man with a young daughter and I love both of them very much. But the fact of the matter is that once that guy started getting laid he stopped producing at the plate. He needs to focus on being a Simon and if it takes me bending her over the hood of my car on Sunset Boulevard for all the world to see so be it. I�m willing to take that bullet.� (For what it�s worth, I�m willing to take that bullet for Mal as well.)

6. Mark Bennett getting his vasectomy reversed and trying for child number five under the auspices of him wanting a daughter when in actuality he just wants another kid so he can name him Mike Stanton and cuddle with him and give him little kisses rather than the bobblehead he keeps in his special place.

7. Perk waking up some cold morning in February and realizing that David Eckstein is his lone offensive keeper. Unfortunately after this realization he lives out his own version of �Groundhog Day� and wakes up every morning realizing that David Eckstein is his lone offensive keeper until draft day.

Remember, Major League Baseball wants to move the season up in 2011 so we may be drafting a little earlier next year. Check those calendars and see if there are any conflicts (Dale, I know your wife turns 39 again sometime in early April and you�re heading off to sand and sun with a much more expensive Albert Pujols in tow).

Dale has already selected Bryce Harper with the first overall pick in the 2011 supplemental draft.

If there are any issues you�d like to put to a vote by the league let me or young James know and we�ll try to compile a survey if need be. I think Jamie is going to purge the onroto rosters shortly so get one final look at Kosuke Fukudome and then ask yourself how that guy ever became an �O� in the first place. Same with Mike Fontenot. Is it really any wonder that the Cubs still can�t win a World Series?

And lastly, The Druids are considering another statue this offseason: �We think Jose Tabata could be a special player. As long as he stays with his current wife we think he will continue to hit and steal bases and try to spend as much time at the park as possible. If he dumps her for Rihanna then we�ll have to rethink that stance."

Drew Gallagher

Final 2010 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	70.5	.2767 10	291 10	1197 10	186 9	108 10	74 7.5	3.63 9	1.274 7
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	62	.2653 6	253 9	1112 9	204 10	102 6	102 10	3.73 7	1.323 5
Scottsmen Dale Scott	57.5	.2689 7	241 7	987 7	138 6	107 8.5	53 4	3.66 8	1.232 10
City Slickers Marty Slickers	55	.2726 9	202 5	940 6	156 8	106 7	40 2	3.50 10	1.257 8
Beachrats Rick Frantz	51.5	.2695 8	249 8	1017 8	132 4.5	95 5	75 9	3.92 3	1.286 6
The Simons Mal Maher	43	.2583 4	224 6	930 5	98 3	107 8.5	74 7.5	3.74 6	1.335 3
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher Tom Gallagher	31	.2521 1	182 2	846 4	71 1	82 3	71 6	3.76 5	1.253 9
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	25	.2558 2	185 3	819 3	150 7	91 4	41 3	4.33 1	1.381 2
Question Marks Mark Bennett	24.5	.2567 3	173 1	708 1	132 4.5	73 2	65 5	3.77 4	1.330 4
Druids Drew Gallagher	18	.2599 5	187 4	782 2	92 2	67 1	28 1	4.04 2	1.382 1

Perk Is Cut Off
Mal Maher, 5/18/10

Throughout the course of history, the ESL league has realities and each player has SOP's (standard operating procedures.) I've summarized each GM's trading profile below. Enjoy the read.

Before I go off on a tangent. Perk go fuck yourself. Now that I've sealed my own fate let's move on.

1. ChrisMal seems to have the ability to hoard talent and an edge over everyone else with draft picks, free agents, etc. He'll never make an even trade but that's what makes him the George Steinbrenner of this league.

2. Drew is all talk. Talk trade trade trade and well nothing happens. He's nice to your face and stabs you whenever he can with insults. I'm currently in therapy after the harassing/beating i took at the draft. Just in case you missed my above comment, perk..go fuck yourself.

3. Chuck God bless him is up for anything at anytime... His quotes and emails are at times beyond understanding but Chuck is a mover and shaker. Love him.

4. Jamie I can't even discuss now because our situation is heading for an infringement lawsuit.

5. Marty...I'll be a SOB he asks me for a starter then 24 hours later doesn't want a starter because his leppers put together a few good starts. BRIGHT SIDE: Marty emailed me back more than once AND actually has shown signs of trading life.

6. Rick ...new guy in a word sucks. "Hi I'm Rick and I want to trade...PSYCH, no i don't"

7. Mr. Bennett....my boy never a harsh word

8. Dale...smooth and steady Dale. Can't say a damn thing about Dale. I'd like to say "I love dale he always sends offers and is up for trades but he's not." Dale is our vanilla ice cream. No flavors, no fun, but no staining either. Dale comes home from work with no skidmarks on the undies. He's cleaner than a twice a day tested Manny Ramirez.

9. Me I'm a complete lunatic and push the panic button but i'm a realist. My hitters suck and i have arms.....just like 1/2 the teams in this league have no arms and a ton of hitting. Simple solution??? BALANCE YOUR ROSTERS!!! but I'm the lunatic? tell you what 2 months from now when you have no shot moving up the pitching categories remember this email.

10. Perk...you're dead to me

Ownership Change
Drew Gallagher, 1/08/10

Gentlemen,

Paul has decided that the ESL was taking a little too much of his time and has opted to ply his National League talents elsewhere. Fortunately, Rick Franz who has been in the ASL for a few years now, took over the much-maligned franchise earlier today. Rick quickly held a press conference before Daniel Snyder could find a reason to attend and stand at the podium with Rick. His comments were brief but pointed:

�I figure if Perk can win this league then I should be able to win it too.�

Although he has two very cheap closers (including a very personal attachment to Leo Nunez that goes back to his days in Kansas City), his reasoning for accepting ownership was based on something that can�t be measured:

�Some might�ve viewed this as an opportunity to add Mal as a friend on Facebook, but I viewed it as an opportunity to draft Melky Cabrera.�

Rick intends to spend the next few days hoping that Orlando Hudson signs with an NL team and fully relishing the trade rumors surrounding Jorge Cantu this offseason.

And I would be remiss in not reminding everyone that draft day is April 9th at 5 PM. In news related to the earlier start time, Mal trades the Druids Mike Stanton for a Fudgie the Whale cake.

To all, a good weekend. Go Iggles!

Final 2009 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	63.5	.269 8	265 7	1087 9	193 9	97 8	56 5.5	3.80 8	1.27 9
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	58	.265 4	271 8	1056 6	197 10	97 8	61 7	4.06 7	1.30 8
Scottsmen Dale Scott	55	.275 9	293 10	1135 10	132 4	104 10	90 9	4.40 2	1.41 1
Question Marks Mark Bennett	54	.264 3	245 5	1082 8	149 8	97 8	47 2	3.22 10	1.23 10
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher Tom Gallagher	51	.269 7	246 6	1072 7	70 1	94 6	64 8	3.72 9	1.32 7
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	47	.278 10	200 3	949 4	139 6	92 5	98 10	4.25 4	1.38 5
City Slickers Marty Slickers	36.5	.263 2	278 9	1054 5	137 5	90 4	56 5.5	4.34 3	1.38 3
The Simons Mal Maher	33	.268 6	134 1	739 1	142 7	81 3	54 4	4.24 5	1.37 6
U.S.A. Forces Paul Rosa Jack Mitchell	29	.266 5	201 4	837 3	123 3	66 1	51 3	4.16 6	1.38 4
Druids Drew Gallagher	13	.261 1	187 2	827 2	81 2	70 2	37 1	4.48 1	1.39 2

Threepeat?
Drew Gallagher, 9/29/08

PRESS RELEASE

September 28, 2008; Millwood, VA:

Perkolators' owner and Tim Lincecum fluffer, Jon Perkins was photographed today holding a bottle of Korbell in one hand and raising his middle finger on the other hand as he put lovechild Ryan Theriot in a bear hug. When asked if the finger was directed at anyone in particular he responded:

"The finger is for threepeat! You tell the rest of the ESL that we'll be holding a clinic before next year's draft on how to win back to back championships. So the finger is merely a symbol of success and not directed at anyone in particular. Now that you mention it though�tell those fifth-place Scottsmen it's for them."

Perk then took a long swing of champagne before wrestling Kevin Kouzmanoff to the floor and tickling his belly.

Thus endeth the first repeat championship in the ESL since the Malcontents did it many years ago. And the championship was not without some last day stress. Had the Malcontents gotten another hit or two on Sunday they likely would've passed the Chuck N Ducks in batting average and only needed to salvage a half point elsewhere in the standings to tie for first. When the skintight standings were broached with an increasingly drunk Perkins he had this to say:

"A couple of hits? Come on, this team was built to withstand all comers from the outset. I admit that I made quite a few shrewd moves along the way, not the least of which was Fernando Tatis, but we coasted down the stretch. This team was a better investment than my 401K. And please remind Dale that this middle finger is for him�"

The race for first place did come down to the last day of the season but the race for the third place literally came down to one of the last innings played in the regular season. When Delwyn Young pinch-hit in the ninth inning of the Dodger game yesterday the Druids' season hung in the balance. The Druids trailed Marty in batting average by mere percentage points. If Delwyn had made an out Marty would've beat Drew in average and tied Mal for fifth place and the Druids would've tied the Scottsmen for third place. Instead, Mr. Young doubled to deep rightfield and the Druids' batting average cleared Marty by one hit. If the Mets had won yesterday it all may have hinged upon a Endy Chavez pinch-hit appearance today. What might've been...

Congratulations to all of the money winners and thanks to all three of the new owners for making the league as competitive as it has been in recent memory. Paul made a run at the money while still managing to stow away some nice players for next year. The Question Marks and Chuck N Ducks retooled their rosters extensively at the trade deadline and both are loaded with keepers for 2009. (And thanks to my Dad for beating Dale by one very important RBI.)

Payouts will be issued in something approximating real time and not Winterburn time.

I enjoyed the season and will now begin my six-month quest to get Shane Victorino back where he belongs. And please let me finish by uttering the phrase that Mal has been dying to hear: "Let the trades begin."

Final 2008 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	59.5	.267 2	263 6	1072 8	175 9	97 8	62 6.5	3.79 10	1.252 10
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	58	.268 4	291 10	1197 10	135 5	108 9	80 10	4.08 4	1.337 6
Druids Drew Gallagher	50	.275 8	230 3	998 4	185 10	76 2	75 9	4.03 6	1.327 8
Scottsmen Dale Scott	49	.275 9	271 8	1008 5	148 7	109 10	64 8	4.61 1	1.430 1
The Simons Mal Maher	45	.277 10	245 5	1094 9	129 4	93 6	59 5	4.14 3	1.348 3
City Slickers Marty Slickers	44	.274 7	243 4	1017 7	155 8	88 5	52 4	4.06 5	1.347 4
U.S.A. Forces Paul Rosa Jack Mitchell	40	.261 1	286 9	987 3	91 1	96 7	50 3	3.99 7	1.317 9
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	35	.271 6	207 2	981 2	128 3	84 4	44 2	3.83 9	1.335 7
Question Marks Mark Bennett	33.5	.267 3	166 1	766 1	136 6	80 3	62 6.5	3.99 8	1.346 5
Chuck & Duck Chuck Gallagher Tom Gallagher	26	.268 5	267 7	1009 6	118 2	68 1	23 1	4.34 2	1.417 2

2007 Annual Winter Rankings
Jamie Schlesinger, 11/16/07

*I will summarize the 3 other teams once we know what is going on.

Jamie
Offense: B
Decent core of Wright, Loney and Drew (assuming he picks up where he left off in the playoffs). Reynolds could be valuable if Tracy gets moved. I have some other question marks who could be starters with Ortmeier $2, T Abreu $5, Headley $7, Keppinger $5 and Burke $8.

Starting Pitching: D
All I can say is I have Billingsley and possibly Villaneuva.

Closers: B
Izzy $17 had a nice season and is a good value assuming he is healthy. I hope one of Howry and Marmol is the closer as Dempster is supposedly in the rotation.

Minors: B-
Rasmus is young and could be patrolling CF in July.

Chris Mal
Offense: A
Phenominal OF lead by Byrnes and Young (thanks Mal for making the rich richer). Trades may be down fall with Kemp and Quentin in many packages.

Starting Pitching: D-
Might have one SP keeper if Bush is traded and Pelfrey goes to the pen.

Closers: A
May have 3 cheap closers with Valverde, Corpas and possibly Linebrink.

Minors: A
Votto, Gomez, Bruce and Bailey may start the year in the NL.

Drew
Offense: C+
Basically five keeper options at this point lead by a cheap Uggla and a $10 Victorino.

Starting Pitching: C
No head toppers but decent value in Gorzelanny and Maine.

Closers: D-
None but potentially Fuentes could find a role if he is traded.

Minors: None

Marty
Offense: A
Love the core of Phillips, McCann, A Gonzalez, Pence and Hart for under $35. You certainly have room to move someone like Hawpe for a SP and do yourself a favor with pitching.

Starting Pitching: D-
I must admit Looper was actually not terrible.

Closers: B
I do not want to talk about Weathers.

Minors: C
Kershaw is a great prospect but not sure he makes the staff so he could become a $10 rookie SP. Gonzalez is a nice prospect too but no place to play at the moment. He also seems to be trade bait for Arizona.

Perk
Offense: B-
Certainly could have some cheap SB value potentially with The Riot, Bourn, Weeks and Davis (if he gets PT). Not a whole lot of power but you could make that up at the draft given you have a ton of value at pitcher.

Starting Pitching: A
Incredibly cheap good young SP with the only reason you do not get an A+ is Sabean saying Lincecum is available. $12 could fill up your whole starting staff on draft day and still finish toward the top in the major categories.

Closers: A+
Three potential closers for $8, wow. We all hope the Astros sign a closer to give us a chance.

Minors: D-
At least you have nothing here.

Mal
Offense: C+
Solid base with the #1 catcher and a solid OF in Francoeur but a lot of ? after that. Hamilton could make the grade in the B range.

Starting Pitching: A-
Nice SP staff lead by the Cy Young winner, Young and Mal�s messiah Gallardo. Olsen blew up in the wrong way in 2007, not sure he is a keeper because he is such a head case.

Closers: B-
Wilson at a buck could be a nice cheap closer after that not much there.

Minors: B
Lots of options but most of them have high salaries but one or two may help in 2008.

Final 2007 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	59	.274 5	221 3	984 4	200 10	105 10	74 9	4.00 9	1.31 9
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	56.5	.278 8	269 7	1173 8	159 7	102 8.5	62 5	4.07 7	1.33 6
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	55.5	.280 10	320 10	1256 10	191 9	99 7	69 6.5	4.67 1	1.41 2
Druids Drew Gallagher	46	.275 6	295 8	1103 7	154 6	89 6	53 4	4.24 4	1.35 5
The Simons Mal Maher	44	.267 1	150 1	817 1	176 8	86 5	72 8	3.67 10	1.27 10
City Slickers Marty Slickers	43	.274 4	299 9	1235 9	129 4	77 3	77 10	4.35 3	1.41 1
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	39.5	.279 9	233 4	863 3	133 5	59 1	43 1.5	4.04 8	1.31 8
Scottsmen Dale Scott	38	.271 2	250 5	1027 5	121 3	102 8.5	43 1.5	4.16 6	1.33 7
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	31	.276 7	261 6	1028 6	116 2	69 2	50 3	4.54 2	1.39 3
Millersville Sluggers Mike Moyer Josh Keller	27.5	.273 3	183 2	833 2	66 1	83 4	69 6.5	4.20 5	1.38 4

The Return of the Baseball Caps!
Drew Gallagher, 1/15/07

Gentlemen,

Wanted to let everyone know that one of the ESL�s original 10 owners has agreed to return to the ESL for the 2007 season. Mr. Winterburn has opted to not return and so Mike Capilo will be taking over his team.

I have known Mike for 30 years and never once has he come close to finishing in the money in the ESL. His modest goals for the upcoming season are to break the Millersville Sluggers modest run of mediocrity and finish in the sixth place spot just out of the money.

Please allow Mike some time to digest his team (Jamie, this means you) and figure out who the hell some of these players are. His first order of business will be to make a trade with Perk for Matt Capps. His second order of business will be to put Scott Olsen on The Maher of Simpleton�s team so he stops bugging the rest of us.

Winterburn will be missed (I think he may have been the third longest tenured member of the league) but he ultimately decided that there were more important things in life than waiting on Felix Pie to finally make the majors.

Your once and future king.

Drew

Ownership Change in ESL
Drew Gallagher, 12/18/06

Gentlemen,

It is with some reservations that I introduce a new owner to replace Zo who has opted for early retirement from the ESL.

There are a couple of reasons for trepidation but the major two are:

1. He went to college with Jamie and still remains in close contact with Jamie

2. His name is Mal and any further association with that moniker gives me pause in the light of Chris� continued dominance of the league

He at least started off by asking me to thank all of you for allowing him to join the league (as if that is some coveted position). He promises to be very active and denies that there is any truth to the rumor that Jamie required the rights to David Wright before submitting his name for ESL consideration.

Zo�s formidable presence will be missed on the floor of my parents� house this draft day but Mal has already asked when he should send in his entrance fees for 2007. Apparently he understands that making transactions is important for franchise success.

And speaking of entrance fees, if anyone sees Scott Winterburn or has heard from him regarding payment of winnings please let me know. It is unfortunate that payout of winnings appears to be close to a Christmas miracle this year.

Thanks,
Drew

2006 Annual Winter Rankings
Jamie Schlesinger, 12/11/06

As I did last off season I put together the off season power rankings (because I would rather do this than work). I will do it a little differently and give grades vs rankings.

Jamie
Strength: Lots of Middle Infielders (Drew, Weeks, Burke, Durham, Furcal, Carroll and Izturis) and a solid offensive core with Cabrera and Francoeur for under $25. If I can find a team looking for some offense we can probably make a move or two to help each other out.

Weakness: No closer and no stud ace. My boy is off to better things and Turnblow is still trying to find the strike zone.

Offense: A-
Starting Pitching: C+
Closers: F Unless my Stanton or Turnblow get another opportunity

Chris Mal
Strength: Depending on the rest of the off season, Chris could have some nice depth with his offense especially with young outfield anchored by Holliday. He has a few question marks like Bautista, Ethier, Quentin and Duffy plus the post hyped Hermida. His pitching is interesting too with a couple of young starters like Johnson, James and Reyes and the injured Patterson but his strength is his bullpen. Chris could potentially have four closers with Gonzalez, Valverde, Tankersley and Wood or he could have none if Gonzalez gets traded, if Valverde regresses, the fish sign a vet to close again and the long shot Wood gets hurt again.

Weakness: Besides Johnson, Chris does not have much in the infield.

Offense: B
Starting Pitching: C
Closers: B potentially could be an A+

Drew
Strength: Drew has a nice core of undervalued infielders with Berkman, Uggla, Lopez, Nomar and Lee and a few decent SP but like Chris his strength is his bullpen. Although like Chris this off season could be interesting as he has a solid closer in Fuentes and two tweeners. Will Dempster close in 2007 (I am surprised he made it through 2006) and will Valverde keep the job all season so Julio has value.

Weakness: Outfielders.

Offense: B
Starting Pitching: B-
Closers: B

Gerry
Strength: Can Hall and Hanley do it again? If they can that is an excellent MI that provides power and speed. If he decides to keep Soriano at $43 he will have about 70 HR and 100+ SB from 3 players for around $60.

Weakness: He lost all of his keepable pitchers since their contracts are up plus with Izzy�s injury he might not be a keeper either so he has no closers either.

Offense: C (only if the three big names produce, if not it could be ugly)
Starting Pitching: F since he has none
Closer: Incomplete because of Izzy

Marty
Strength: I was way off in my assessment of Marty�s team last off season. Everything Marty touched turned to gold. Chris Duncan? Marty made some shrewd moves by keeping Laroche (who broke out) and Hawpe (although I would have kept him too) and was able to pickup Phillips to fill in at 2B the whole season. That group along with Beltran and a cheap McCann and Gonzalez provide a solid offense and now a very good keeper list. Clemens could be a thorn on his side until keepers are due and he might have to make a tough decision.

Weakness: The Clemens situation other than that he is in good shape

Offense: A
Starting Pitching: C (without Clemens) B (with him)
Closers: C+ (only a $34 Wagner)

Perk
Strength: Perk has one luxury this off season the potential to have 3 cheap closers. We know Cordero is a closer the question is if Bowden is stupid enough to trade him to the Sox. Saito is back and is #1 on the depth chart in LA and Wainwright performed very well in the playoffs but does he get bumped to the rotation if Izzy is healthy. That said, he has some depth to play with to help his offense.

Weakness: Offense, plain and simple. Tracy regressed a bit but is still solid value but other than that he does not have much.

Offense: D-
Starting Pitching: C- (Only true starter is Myers)
Closers: A

Mike/Josh
Strength: The best offensive value in the league in Ryan Howard and a perennial Cy Young candidate with Carpenter for under $30 combined. With Carpenter as his anchor, a solid $22 Smoltz and a group that includes a $7 Davis, $5 Cain and Sanchez Mike has a nice pitching staff. He has two head cases at closer with Lidge and Benitez both were either hurt or lost their role in 2006.

Weakness: Most importantly, listening to Chris and Drew. Secondly, your offense after Howard and a cheap Castillo.

Offense: A+ with Howard and F from everything else, overall C-
Starting Pitching: A
Closers: B-

Zo
Strength: He has David Wright for the next 4 years for $20. Will he keep Pujols for $50 and is that a record for a keeper? Gordon at $23 is a decent value at closer and both Weathers and Howry have an opportunity to close in 2007.

Weakness: Considering Zo has not been able to make a FAAB bid in 2 years and he missed the 2nd half of the draft last year I am surprised he has almost 10 keepers. That said, not a lot there but some potential.

Offense: C, a $20 Wright is a nice value and a $6 Encarnacion make up the offense.
Starting Pitching: D IF Sheets can stay healthy he can be an ace if not he is in trouble.
Closers: B

Scott
Strength: Every year I over estimate Scott�s team but he again has a solid hitting young core. Atkins broke out, Freel and Tavarez steal a ton of bases and Jackson is Wally Joyner at 1B.

Weakness: Inexperienced and injury plagued pitching staff has killed Scott the past few years. A high priced Peavy had a down year, Prior was hurt again and Duke did not live up to the hype.

Offense: A-
Starting Pitching: C
Closers: D (only if Coffey/Bray do not close)

Dale
Strength: Fielder $10 and Sanchez $1 are a nice core. Willingham is OF eligible next year but is still a nice keeper at $8. Roberts $17 (is old) can still steal bases and signed a nice deal in SF who needs some kind of offense.

Weakness: Not much when it comes to pitching after Penny. Broxton is the close of the future but that might not be until end of 2007 or 2008.

Offense: B (if Ensberg comes back he could be an A-)
Starting Pitching: F
Closers: C- (Maybe Wheeler or Broxton sneak in a few saves)

Misled
Michael Moyer, 10/03/06

Drew and Chris,
After reading the email that Drew sent out I would like to take this time to make you aware of my disappointment not only in the two of you but in the league as a whole. It is absolutely unfair that you both let me get my hopes up for one more long season of baseball with another 6th place finish. If Chris could have only stayed ahead of Wormy and gotten a couple more homes runs, I would have been in 5th. Also, if Drew could have gotten a couple more stolen bases; once again I am living gloriously in 5th place. And last but not least the trade that both of you thought was a good idea would have gotten me enough wins to be in first place. So the moral of the story is that you both have lead me wrong in my whole baseball career starting with me getting a gnove that was too big for my little hand!
Michael

Towing Away the Title
Drew Gallagher, 10/03/06

Gentlemen,

Well, there wasn�t a whole lot of drama for the winner this year. Mr. Slicker ran away with it and our perpetual bridesmaid pulled away for second in the waning moments. The Sluggers seem to be taking a liking to that sixth place spot, just out of the money and wishing that the season was another week longer. Still, only two years into this fantasy baseball thing the boys from Millersville are getting awfully close.

If any owners are not interested in returning in 2007 please let us know immediately so we can fill the opening. Also, it really would make life easier if everyone paid their entrance fees before the end of April. Yes, Zo, this is directed at you. I know it can�t be much fun not being able to make transactions and it�s killing Jamie that there is an entire roster that he is unable to plunder. This year we also ran into an issue with the 1,000 innings requirement where Zo�s squad was unable to make the innings and gave some points away to other owners. Fortunately it did not impact the final standings.

Chris will be sending out the surveys in a few months so please list any issues that you would like to have addressed in the survey. One point that Dale has asked be placed on the survey is the trading deadline. Since we now have six crossover owners from the ASL,

he thinks that it would make sense to get the rules in line with one another. I agree that it would make life easier. The trade deadline would be pushed back to a later point in the year where those teams that are out of the running would be able to �dump� for the next season. Of course, dumping can greatly impact/influence the pennant race so consider this when voting.

In the ASL we also �reward� The Millersville Sluggers position in the standings with the number 1 pick in the supplemental draft (actually we do the 5th place in the ASL but we need to change that). This keeps some of the bottom teams interested longer. The supplemental rounds would go 6-10 and then 1-5 or 5-1. May be something else we could consider.

I am certain I am forgetting some other issues to discuss so please bring them up as you see fit.

Thanks to everyone and congratulations to Marty, Mini Mal, Mal and Winterburn. It is with a heavy heart that I relinquish the title of ESL Champion.

And now the moment that Jamie has been waiting for�let the trade talks begin!

Thanks,
Drewer

Final 2006 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
City Slickers Marty Slickers	66	.287 10	319 10	1135 8	113 3	93 7	94 10	4.09 10	1.35 8
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	59	.283 9	282 8	1215 10	152 6	108 10	51 3	4.33 7	1.38 6
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	55	.274 5	279 6	1109 7	124 4	93 7	67 8	4.18 8	1.30 10
Druids Drew Gallagher	49.5	.275 7	270 5	1073 6	194 9	89 4.5	77 9	4.52 5	1.40 4
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	44	.274 6	281 7	1147 9	195 10	85 3	52 4	4.53 3	1.42 2
Millersville Sluggers Mike Moyer Josh Keller	41	.266 2	221 3	942 3	82 2	93 7	57 6	4.10 9	1.32 9
Scottsmen Dale Scott	39	.272 4	257 4	1069 5	127 5	99 9	27 1	4.46 6	1.39 5
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	35.5	.270 3	302 9	1036 4	168 8	89 4.5	37 2	4.83 2	1.42 3
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	26	.265 1	199 2	917 2	78 1	80 2	61 7	4.53 4	1.36 7
The Pauls Lorenzo Paul	25	.281 8	197 1	827 1	166 7	42 1	53 5	4.16 1*	1.39 1*
* The Pauls did not meet the 1000+ innings requirement and dropped to last in ERA and Ratio.

2005 Winter Meeting Power Rankings
Jamie Schlesinger, 11/03/05

To get some trade talk going during the GM meetings I thought it would worthwhile to put together my power
rankings (and to waste time at work). Obviously a lot
can change due to free agency and trades, but why not
have some discussion. Based on potential keepers here is my list:

Offense:
1. Scott W
2. Zo
3. Your Pal
4. Jamie
5. Dale
6. Perk
7. Marty
8. Drew
9. Mike
10. Gerry

Pitching:
1. Drew
2. Jamie
3. Mike
4. Marty
5. Dale
6. Your Pal
7. Perk
8. Gerry
9. Scott W
10. Zo

Your Pal
Strength: Young OF prospects and my boy Brady Clark
Weakness: Closers unless M Gonzo closes with Pirates

Drew
Strength: Cheap closers
Weakness: No Offense besides Berkman and Overbay who could be traded

Jamie
Strength: Cheap closers and a good value Oswalt
Weakness: Needs a power hitting OF

Marty
Strength: Utley broke out and is a great value in a
weak position and has decent SP value
Weakness: No closers and not much offensive depth

Perk
Strength: Lopez and Tracy had big years and are cheap ($2 and $10 respectively)
Weakness: No closers and Clemens is a question mark
since he might retire

Gerry
Strength: Good value at SP
Weakness: No offense to speak of besides Hall

Mike/Josh
Strength: An under $10 Cy Young winner and a $2 D
Davis
Weakness: Besides Howard not a lot of value in
offense

Scott W
Strength: Very good offensive core with Cabrera,
Bonds, Weeks, Bay, Tavarez and Freel.
Weakness: Closers even though he has several closer
on his roster none of which a locks in 2006

Zo
Strength: Wright and Reyes are very good keepers and
can fetch a solid return if you make a move
Weakness: Do I need to write anything?

Dale
Strength: Decent SP core with Pettite, Hernandez and
Penny
Weakness: Not a lot of offense besides Ensberg and
hopefully Fielder

Year in Review
Drew Gallagher, 10/04/05

Gentlemen,

First of all, congratulations to those of you who cashed and especially Gerry who rode Marlon Anderson to an improbable last-week surge in the standings. How does Michael go home and explain to Sue that Marlon Anderson's three home runs in the last week cost them money for the wedding? Can you say cash bar at the reception? (Special shout out to Mike Capilo for drafting the Orlando juggernaut and providing an April foundation for Marlon Anderson's heroics.)

Chris is going to provide Scott a breakdown of the proceeds in the next few days and we should be getting checks from Scott in the very near future. In that vein, if any of you have not paid please make arrangements to do so. Payments are not going to be witheld because of any gaps in the entrance fees but will be rectified when said monies are paid. Remember, the ESL has an "entrance" fee not an exit fee.

Chris will be sending out winter survey questions in a few months. Prior to that time, we would ask that anyone who is not returning next season please let us know so we can find a new owner(s).

I thought that Marty, Zo and Michael (Josh anyone?) were fine additions to the league and hope that you all enjoyed it as well. (Beyond getting cars impounded moments before the draft.) Note to Michael: Mr. Perkins blames you exclusively for his disastrous season. He said that he will not be helping the conglomerate at next year's draft. Might be time to call in Tom Holland!

Special thanks to Chris (as always) for keeping things running smoothly and allowing one season in 21 years where his pitching tanked.

I know everyone is looking forward to that first offer from Jamie. Please bear in mind that I have three closers and am desperate for some offensive help so I am willing to consider any and all offers.

Go Red Sox!

The Druids
2005 ESL Champions

P.S.--It's good to be the king!

Final 2005 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Druids Drew Gallagher	66	.273 9	233 7	930 4	143 7	107 9	115 10	3.36 10	1.23 10
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	65	.271 6	246 8	998 8	147 9	111 10	112 9	3.76 9	1.33 6
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	52	.278 10	314 10	1124 10	157 10	85 4	45 4	4.34 2	1.38 2
Scottsmen Dale Scott	45	.270 5	254 9	978 7	47 1	98 6	39 3	3.88 7	1.27 7
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	43	.272 7	218 4	933 5	137 6	101 7	46 5	4.13 4	1.33 5
Millersville Sluggers Mike Moyer Josh Keller	42	.268 2	217 3	925 3	114 3	103 8	75 7	3.84 8	1.27 8
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	36	.268 3	216 2	941 6	146 8	68 2	87 8	4.16 3	1.38 4
City Slickers Marty Slickers	32	.270 4	198 1	862 2	92 2	84 3	64 6	4.02 6	1.26 9
The Bronx Zo Lorenzo Paul	32	.272 8	228 6	1024 9	127 5	39 1	1 1	4.69 1	1.45 1
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	27	.267 1	226 5	905 2	124 4	94 5	19 2	4.11 5	1.38 3

Drew's Letter to John Hunt, 12/30/04

John,

I sent you an e-mail last year about my friend Chris Malinowski and will make another plug for his consideration in the LABR draft this year. Much like Ryne Sandberg in the Hall, I think Chris should get a shot at the LABR National League.

Our Eternal Squabblers League just completed its 20th season. Chris (The Malcontents) has won the league an amazing 14 times including 2004 which makes him eligible for the LABR. He has a phenomenal web site, www.yourpalchrismal.com, that I think you would enjoy and appreciate. If you click on the rotisserie feature of the site and go to the ESL portion he has the standings for all 20 years along with each team's all-time leader in categories. The information he has compiled on our league is amazing. I know you're quite busy and can't go surfing through a plethora of web sites but if you have a moment you may want to take this one in for the rotisserie portion. (Plus there are photos of our first Yoo-Hoo ceremony from 1985 when we were all in high school and much thinner with more hair. The Yoo-Hoo ceremony was ultimately discontinued but we were true to the founding fathers for the first few years!)

Chris' dominance has given birth to some draft day lingo such as The Malinowski Tax. The way the tax works is if bidding is slow and seems to be about to end, Chris will subtly enter if the player interests him. What was a "going once, going twice..." now has five other owners in it because the player must be good if Chris wants him and if he really wants him he needs to pay much more for him. There is also a new owner who tries to emulate Chris and practically sits on his lap at draft day. We call him Mini Mal.

When we started the ESL in 1985 only two of our 10 owners were over 16 and could drive. It was an outgrowth of our playing stickball together in Pennside, PA. One of our three original owners retired after 2004 and 20 years as an owner. He said that he didn't have the time for it to which my wife responded that she couldn't see how a "fantasy team" could require all that much time since it didn't really exist. Chris and I are the only two original owners remaining but the league continues with the rest of us mired in the never-ending quest for second place.

Thanks for your consideration of my friend as a candidate for the LABR draft!

Drew Gallagher

Final 2004 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	68	.278 8	330 10	1164 9	143 7	112 9	80 6	3.82 9	1.24 10
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	63	.268 4	267 6	1027 6	171 9	124 10	92 9	3.65 10	1.24 9
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	60	.281 9	301 8	1172 10	191 10	85 3	91 8	3.90 7	1.35 5
Druids Drew Gallagher	48	.272 5	283 7	1118 8	148 8	89 5	14 2	4.08 5	1.31 8
Scottsmen Dale Scott	46	.285 10	311 9	1112 7	127 6	90 6	10 1	4.17 4	1.36 3
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	36.5	.274 6	232 3	908 3	119 4.5	99 8	129 10	4.43 1	1.41 1
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	34	.259 1	233 4	973 5	81 2	87 4	44 3	3.89 8	1.33 7
Robesonia Huskies Scott Metcalfe	32	.276 7	209 1	938 4	102 3	98 7	78 5	4.25 3	1.36 2
Re-Pete Offenders Pete DeCoursey	31.5	.261 2	235 5	907 2	119 4.5	76 2	45 4	4.06 6	1.34 6
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	21	.265 3	230 2	906 1	59 1	59 1	87 7	4.35 2	1.36 4

Drew's Letter to John Hunt, 1/06/04

I do not know if you guys are going to invite any laypeople to the spring LABR draft, but wanted to offer up my self-serving credentials. Actually, just wanted to share with someone that 2004 will mark the 20th anniversaries of both our Altered State League (AL only) and Eternal Squabblers League (NL only). I'm certain there are a few leagues that have already celebrated 20 years, but I was only 15 when the ASL began and my father had to drive me to the draft since I didn't have a license.

Dad, not aware of the length of such an affair, was employed as auctioneer about halfway through and he has continued as auctioneer for almost every one of those 20 years. Of the 12 original owners, I was the youngest by 10 years when the league started and I am now the only original member of the league that has participated for all 20 years. (I have one championship to show for it but let's skip that part.) I'd be willing to bet there aren't many out there who have done this for 20 years with those 20 years making up more than half their lives.

Never missed a draft. Even through college when I would sometimes have to take the train five hours to get back from college since I didn't have a car at school.

After participating in the ASL draft in March of 1985, I was so enamored with the concept that I got a group of my friends together and we started our NL only league at the all-star break of 1985. We had a half season (doing stats by hand) and have continued with that league as well. There are three of the original 10 owners who have competed for all 20 years. Pretty impressive in my mind.

So I offer up to you, how many other rotisserie players have been in two leagues for 20 years straight? Trust me, this does not impress my wife.

Thanks for your time and I look forward to the fantasy baseball column starting up again soon.

Drew Gallagher

Final 2001 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	69.5	.284 10	334 10	1314 10	176 9	101 8.5	79 7	4.10 7	1.31 8
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	56.5	.275 7	292 7	1122 8	117 4	101 8.5	40 4	4.01 8	1.27 10
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli/S.Julian	55	.274 6	303 8	1074 7	132 6	99 7	12 2	3.91 10	1.30 9
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	53	.270 5	315 9	1149 9	127 5	94 6	110 10	4.16 6	1.40 3
Scottsmen Dale Scott	50	.276 8	247 4	1062 6	142 7	136 10	71 6	4.29 4	1.33 5
E-Z Does It Mike Z/Eric S/Mike C	41.5	.259 2	222 3	860 3	144 8	88 4.5	70 5	3.96 9	1.33 7
Druids Drew Gallagher	39	.280 9	279 6	1041 5	177 10	77 1	11 1	4.26 5	1.40 2
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	34	.270 4	262 5	987 4	116 3	81 3	85 8	4.39 3	1.37 4
Perkolators Jon Perkins	29.5	.263 3	203 1	843 2	104 2	88 4.5	89 9	4.57 2	1.33 6
Rosas from the Dirt P.Rosa/R.Lombardi	12	.258 1	217 2	734 1	100 1	80 2	28 3	4.89 1	1.47 1

Final 2000 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	73	.284 9	338 10	1317 10	220 10	107 10	79 8	4.10 9	1.38 7
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	52.5	.289 10	301 8	1126 8.5	211 9	104 8	67 6	4.91 2	1.51 1
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	50.5	.274 3	326 9	1111 7	154 7	98 6.5	29 1	4.18 7	1.31 10
Druids Drew Gallagher	46.5	.280 7	253 4	983 4	124 4	98 6.5	45 4	4.11 8	1.35 9
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	45.5	.273 2	278 5.5	1032 5	93 1	88 4	91 10	3.96 10	1.36 8
E-Z Does It M.Zalegowski/E.Strauss	45	.275 6	161 1	852 2	202 8	106 9	81 9	4.41 6	1.44 4
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	44.5	.284 8	286 7	1126 8.5	127 5	79 2	49 5	4.57 4	1.42 5
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	36.5	.275 4	278 5.5	1097 6	105 2	90 5	39 3	4.52 5	1.39 6
Perkolators Jon Perkins	23	.275 5	226 3	974 3	108 3	68 1	34 2	4.76 3	1.47 3
Rosas from the Dirt P.Rosa/R.Lombardi	23	.267 1	215 2	817 1	148 6	83 3	69 7	4.91 1	1.48 2

Final 1999 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	75	.285 9	309 9	1278 10	224 10	111 9	95 8	3.61 10	1.28 10
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	63.5	.274 3	302 8	1207 8	214 9	106 8	96 9.5	4.11 9	1.36 9
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	60	.285 10	311 10	1208 9	204 6	120 10	44 4	4.26 6	1.41 5
Perkolators Jon Perkins	54	.280 6	261 4	1113 7	212 8	98 7	62 6	4.21 8	1.36 8
Rosas from the Dirt Paul Rosa/R.Lombardi	42	.283 7	274 5	1051 4	171 5	95 6	25 1	4.26 7	1.37 7
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	38.5	.271 2	292 7	1054 5	131 2	94 5	96 9.5	4.34 5	1.45 3
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	35	.284 8	281 6	1091 6	139 3	81 4	27 2	4.55 2	1.43 4
Druids Drew Gallagher	28	.274 4	195 2	869 1	159 4	68 2	54 5	4.43 4	1.39 6
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	22	.269 1	222 3	897 3	209 7	79 3	31 3	4.87 1	1.50 1
Zen Masters Joe & Andrew Zenyuch	22	.278 5	181 1	872 2	130 1	61 1	70 7	4.48 3	1.47 2

Final 1997 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Rosas from the Dirt P.Rosa/R.Lombardi	62.5	.278 8	212 6.5	907 7	211 10	112 10	7 1	3.40 10	1.19 10
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	62	.272 3	239 10	1086 10	176 6	97 9	117 10	3.83 6	1.28 8
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	62	.281 10	220 8	949 9	135 3	84 8	80 9	3.77 8	1.33 7
The Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	58.5	.273 6	231 9	911 8	189 7	72 4.5	48 6	3.63 9	1.27 9
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	51.5	.273 5	212 6.5	823 5	194 8	75 6	69 8	3.83 7	1.34 6
Family Jules Steve Julian	41.5	.278 9	191 4	858 6	208 9	61 2.5	65 7	3.95 2	1.29 2
Hannon Barbaras Brian Hannon	31.5	.276 7	201 5	790 3	168 5	61 2.5	39 3	4.39 3	1.44 3
Druids Drew Gallagher	30.5	.272 4	156 3	721 2	149 4	72 4.5	46 5	3.96 4	1.40 4
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	30	.266 2	129 2	799 4	106 1	83 7	43 4	3.94 5	1.36 5
Re-Pete Offenders Pete DeCoursey	10	.261 1	121 1	605 1	116 2	49 1	11 2	4.99 1	1.54 1

Final 1996 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	67	.277 8	250 9	1127 10	291 10	96 8	101 10	3.95 6	1.34 6
Druids Drew Gallagher	63	.284 9	237 8	955 7	214 8	84 7	54 6	3.77 9	1.25 9
Re-Pete Offenders Pete DeCoursey	61	.269 3	213 6	984 8	246 9	83 6	69 9	3.74 10	1.24 10
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	58	.272 5	264 10	1041 9	201 7	99 10	66 8	4.13 4	1.35 5
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	48.5	.289 10	196 4	921 6	118 4	98 9	49 4.5	3.91 7	1.35 4
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	38.5	.274 7	216 7	873 5	158 6	72 4	49 4.5	4.38 3	1.38 2
Hannon Barbaras Brian Hannon	31.5	.273 6	201 5	767 4	102 2.5	59 2	56 7	4.45 2	1.37 3
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	29	.262 2	131 2	639 2	120 5	79 5	16 1	4.02 5	1.33 7
Rosas from the Dead Paul Rosa/Rich Lombardi	26	.259 1	126 1	538 1	62 1	67 3	45 3	3.91 8	1.31 8
Family Jules Steve Julian	17.5	.271 4	149 3	647 3	102 2.5	41 1	17 2	4.33 1	1.46 1

Final 2003 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	75	.278 9	319 10	1230 10	175 9	108 10	105 9	3.78 9	1.29 9
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	65.5	.276 8	290 7	1131 8	181 10	80 2.5	107 10	3.72 10	1.27 10
Druids Drew Gallagher	49	.270 4	292 9	1074 7	114 4	99 9	87 7	4.15 4	1.33 5
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	48	.272 6	291 8	1160 9	153 7	96 8	41 4	4.41 3	1.36 3
Robesonia Huskies Scott Metcalfe	44	.273 7	217 4	1047 5	121 5	86 4	103 8	4.04 5	1.33 6
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	42.5	.283 10	247 6	1070 6	159 8	95 6.5	34 3	4.72 1	1.42 2
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	38	.260 1	233 5	947 4	85 2	88 5	46 6	3.88 7	1.30 8
Scottsmen Dale Scott	36.5	.267 3	194 2	770 2	86 3	95 6.5	45 5	3.86 8	1.33 7
Re-Pete Offenders Pete DeCoursey	23.5	.262 2	180 1	732 1	123 6	80 2.5	16 1	3.97 6	1.35 4
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	18	.272 5	205 3	899 3	61 1	64 1	28 2	4.49 2	1.46 1

Final 2002 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	70	.273 9	325 10	1174 10	172 8	107 8	61 5	3.51 10	1.21 10
American Standard Jamie Schlesinger	59	.256 1	255 9	984 6	174 9	96 6	108 10	3.64 9	1.26 9
Scottsmen Dale Scott	59	.285 10	228 5	1021 9	146 5	122 10	78 8	3.80 6	1.32 6
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	50	.262 3	234 6	869 3	184 10	101 7	63 6	3.68 8	1.30 7
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	42.5	.270 7	247 7	1009 7	152 6	113 9	60 3.5	4.37 2	1.40 1
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	40	.272 8	223 4	919 5	103 2	84 4	84 9	4.14 4	1.38 4
Druids Drew Gallagher	34	.269 6	252 8	1018 8	140 4	69 1	29 2	4.33 3	1.38 2
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	33.5	.264 4	173 1	794 2	107 3	87 5	60 3.5	3.76 7	1.29 8
Robesonia Huskies Scott Metcalfe	27	.268 5	200 3	890 4	157 7	77 3	20 1	4.38 1	1.38 3
The Perkolators Jon Perkins	25	.260 2	190 2	773 1	92 1	74 2	67 7	4.03 5	1.37 5

Final 1998 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	66	.275 7	287 9	1228 10	196 9	116 10	81 8	3.91 6	1.33 7
Perkolators Jon Perkins	65	.277 9	289 10	1159 9	133 4	108 8	72 7	3.72 8	1.23 10
Re-Pete Offenders Pete DeCoursey	57	.272 5	220 5	934 6	186 7	93 5	103 10	3.67 10	1.28 9
Gerryatrics Gerry Orlando	54	.273 6	243 7	1088 8	206 10	112 9	60 5	4.12 4	1.35 5
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	42	.280 10	280 8	1075 7	139 5	98 6	18 1	4.27 1	1.37 4
Rosas from the Dirt P.Rosa/R.Lombardi	40	.263 1	218 4	902 4	78 1	100 7	71 6	3.70 9	1.30 8
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	38	.271 4	210 3	926 5	192 8	61 1	93 9	3.98 5	1.39 3
Zen Masters Joe & Andrew Zenyuch	31	.276 8	169 2	901 3	146 6	80 4	54 4	4.25 2	1.40 2
Wormburners Scott Winterburn	24.5	.265 2	166 1	751 1	109 3	70 2	25 2.5	3.82 7	1.34 6
Druids Drew Gallagher	22.5	.266 6	228 6	841 2	94 2	77 3	25 2.5	4.22 3	1.41 1

Final 1995 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	68	.270 5	227 9	922 9	180 8	80 10	57 7	3.65 10	1.278 10
Druids Drew Gallagher	61	.284 9	156 6	776 8	183 9	58 3	85 10	3.88 8	1.303 8
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	59	.285 10	258 10	938 10	207 10	67 7	72 9	4.58 1	1.407 2
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	48	.269 4	171 8	726 6	162 7	69 8	52 6	4.18 4	1.346 5
Family Jules Steve Julian	46.5	.276 6	151 4.5	689 4	138 5	78 9	28 4	4.05 7	1.331 7
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	43.5	.283 9	151 4.5	760 7	128 4	59 4	40 5	4.11 5	1.337 6
Smitballs Brian Smith	40	.268 3	140 3	720 5	155 6	62 5	70 8	4.09 6	1.377 4
Murphy's Laws Mike Murphy	39	.281 7	131 1	643 2	88 2	65 6	24 3	3.80 9	1.302 9
Wizards of Koz Mark Kozlowski	22	.263 1	165 7	657 3	70 1	56 2	20 2	4.33 3	1.406 3
Re-Pete Offenders Pete DeCoursey	13	.268 2	133 2	564 1	112 3	55 1	8 1	4.47 2	1.434 1

Final 1994 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	73	.283 8	194 10	770 10	118 8	65 9	64 10	3.72 9	1.289 9
Druids Drew Gallagher	62	.275 5	145 7	668 7	136 9	52 6	44 8	3.57 10	1.228 10
Smitballs Brian Smith	58	.292 10	162 8	756 9	100 6	45 2	40 7	3.81 8	1.304 8
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	51	.272 3	163 9	678 8	155 10	58 7	28 4	4.25 5	1.357 5
Wizards of Koz Mark Kozlowski	38.5	.272 4	143 6	527 5	77 2	72 10	38 5.5	4.44 3	1.401 3
Murphy's Laws Mike Murphy	36	.278 7	135 5	593 6	75 1	62 8	21 3	4.44 4	1.42 2
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	34	.266 1	99 2	464 3	81 4	50 4	46 9	3.83 7	1.357 4
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	34	.270 2	131 4	521 4	94 5	51 5	20 2	4.09 6	1.344 6
Mac Attack Kevin MacHale	30	.283 9	105 3	458 2	80 3	48 3	2 1	4.53 2	1.310 7
Family Jules Steve Julian	23.5	.276 6	93 1	437 1	113 7	32 1	38 5.5	3.79 1*	1.450 1

Final 1993 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	75	.280 9	265 10	1211 10	209 9	94 9	126 10	3.52 9	1.269 9
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	61.5	.289 10	215 9	925 9	217 10	74 4.5	61 8	3.84 6	1.359 5
Smitballs Brian Smith	60	.278 8	167 5	787 5	156 5	99 10	55 7	3.24 10	1.164 10
Druids Drew Gallagher	52	.275 6	211 8	861 8	183 8	75 6	48 5	3.94 5	1.351 6
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	48	.275 7	184 7	792 6	124 3	57 1	77 9	3.60 8	1.298 7
Miller Hi-Lites Rob Miller	34	.271 4	133 3	728 3	112 2	68 3	43 4	3.80 7	1.275 8
Butch & Moans Butch Miller	34	.264 1	173 6	851 7	136 4	84 7	33 3	4.05 4	1.397 2
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	28.5	.274 5	118 2	582 2	181 7	74 4.5	4 2	4.06 3	1.384 3
Wizards of Koz Mark Kozlowski	25	.269 2	95 1	548 1	83 1	89 8	49 6	4.17 2	1.366 4
Murphy's Laws Mike Murphy	22	.270 3	135 4	742 4	167 6	62 2	2 1	4.68 1	1.414 1

Final 1992 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Malcontents Chris Malinowski	71	.265 6	146 9	791 10	228 10	104 10	49 8	3.15 8	1.151 10
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	62	.259 4	121 8	625 7	166 7	79 8	67 9	2.83 10	1.175 9
Smitballs Brian Smith	62	.269 7	118 7	725 8	168 8	78 7	76 10	3.18 7	1.190 8
G. Going Gaughans Drew Gallagher	56.5	.278 10	156 10	753 9	193 9	71 5	46 5.5	3.64 5	1.328 3
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	54	.271 9	117 6	612 6	125 4	89 9	47 7	3.24 6	1.221 7
Ballpark Franks Frank Oliver	42.5	.271 8	98 3	556 4	75 1	77 6	46 5.5	3.14 9	1.261 6
Miller Hi-Lites Rob Miller	30	.256 3	104 4	534 3	140 6	70 4	29 3	3.69 3	1.319 4
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	26	.253 2	112 5	585 5	100 2	65 3	32 4	3.68 4	1.371 1
Murphy's Laws Mike Murphy	18	.246 1	81 1	474 1	129 5	63 2	16 1	3.78 2	1.298 5
Darrylicts Darryl Grumling	18	.261 5	86 2	481 2	108 3	57 1	17 2	4.02 1	1.365 2

Final 1991 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Cool Beans Chris Malinowski	76	.277 10	200 10	949 10	274 10	96 10	73 10	3.27 9	1.246 7
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	63	.248 2	187 9	890 9	220 8	76 6	69 9	3.08 10	1.213 10
G. Going Gaughans Drew Gallagher	62.5	.268 8	172 8	775 8	174 7	89 8	65 7.5	3.37 7	1.231 9
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	57.5	.258 5	154 6	769 7	224 9	91 9	65 7.5	3.33 8	1.260 6
Farr Sides Rob Farr	42	.268 9	131 5	680 6	113 5	78 7	15 2	3.60 4	1.307 4
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	41	.258 6	87 4	446 4	134 6	67 4	32 4	3.60 5	1.244 8
Baserobbers Rob Miller	38	.263 7	163 7	659 5	97 4	72 5	43 6	4.09 1	1.309 3
The Contenders Derek Wilson	22	.250 3	72 2	440 3	90 3	42 1	29 3	3.57 6	1.349 1
Hardbodies Mike Murphy	20	.255 4	56 1	427 2	64 1	64 3	39 5	4.03 2	1.322 2
Ball Park Franks Frank Oliver	18	.246 1	75 3	383 1	84 2	58 2	10 1	3.95 3	1.268 5

Final 1990 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
G. Going Gaughans Drew Gallagher	68.5	.280 9	156 7	776 8	256 10	92 9	52 7.5	3.51 8	1.251 10
Farr Sides Rob Farr	63	.281 10	177 8	769 7	188 6	106 10	35 5	3.40 10	1.273 7
Cool Beans Chris Malinowski	62	.273 7	199 9	904 10	247 9	83 8	63 10	3.70 5	1.312 4
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	60.5	.268 6	221 10	901 9	201 7	64 3.5	55 9	3.64 7	1.256 9
Baserobbers Rob Miller	42.5	.254 1	138 6	585 3	60 1	77 7	52 7.5	3.45 9	1.257 8
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	35	.256 2	116 5	623 5	232 8	63 2	32 4	3.79 4	1.307 5
Hardbodies Mike Murphy	33	.259 3	107 4	575 2	111 2.5	64 3.5	39 6	3.68 6	1.296 6
Ball Park Franks Frank Oliver	31	.266 5	99 2	617 4	156 5	71 6	30 3	3.94 3	1.331 3
Long Shots Derek Wilson	24.5	.274 8	105 3	624 6	111 2.5	61 1	19 2	4.17 1	1.434 1
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	20	.261 4	90 1	434 1	113 4	68 5	8 1	4.07 2	1.412 2

Final 1989 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Cool Beans Chris Malinowski	61.5	.249 2	169 10	764 10	179 9.5	38 1	106 10	2.87 10	1.180 9
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	53	.260 5	138 8	657 8	141 6	84 6	47 7	3.35 7	1.275 6
Julestown Labesabs Steve Julian	50.5	.263 10	103 4	589 6	179 9.5	80 5	29 3	3.43 6	1.262 7
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	50	.249 3	166 9	706 9	178 8	96 10	44 6	3.67 2	1.295 3
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	48.5	.261 7	106 5	569 4	125 3.5	91 8.5	19 1.5	3.04 9	1.163 10
Baserobbers Rob Miller	43.5	.261 6	111 6	580 5	71 1	91 8.5	50 9	3.51 4	1.277 4
Hardbodies Mike Murphy	39	.262 8	99 2	552 2	83 2	77 4	38 5	3.17 8	1.236 8
Drewers Drew Gallagher	36.5	.262 9	123 7	633 7	169 7	74 3	19 1.5	3.96 1	1.362 1
The Tubs Tom Gallagher	35	.242 1	100 3	508 1	126 5	85 7	49 8	3.45 5	1.276 5
Yuenglings Paul Young	22.5	.253 4	95 1	563 3	125 3.5	67 2	36 4	3.65 3	1.298 2

Final 1988 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	63	.261 4	196 10	885 10	203 7	97 9	35 5	3.08 9	1.177 9
Cool Beans Chris Malinowski	57	.262 7	153 9	766 9	225 8	44 1	100 10	3.25 7	1.222 6
The Tubs Tom Gallagher	53	.263 8	119 6	671 7	259 10	102 10	33 4	3.42 4	1.263 4
Drewers Drew Gallagher	47.5	.265 9	140 8	749 8	140 5	92 8	37 6.5	3.49 2	1.277 1
Hardbodies Mike Murphy	40.5	.261 5	110 5	586 5	135 3.5	64 2	59 9	3.15 8	1.272 3
Baserobbers Rob Miller	38.5	.261 6	133 7	670 6	163 6	71 4	37 6.5	3.70 1	1.276 2
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	36.5	.267 10	78 2	482 3	135 3.5	74 5	24 3	3.45 3	1.218 7
Julestown Labesabs Steve Julian	36	.256 2	56 1	434 2	247 9	85 7	22 2	3.40 5	1.208 8
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	34	.233 1	98 3	430 1	78 2	81 6	17 1	2.89 10	1.166 10
Yuenglings Paul Young	34	.259 3	104 4	516 4	73 1	68 3	57 8	3.34 6	1.236 5

Final 1987 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Hardbodies Mike Murphy	62	.285 10	171 5	795 7	215 9.5	98 10	37 5.5	3.94 7	1.31 8
The Tubs Tom Gallagher	56	.276 7	139 3	661 4	195 7	94 9	83 10	3.72 10	1.34 6
Julestown Labesabs Steve Julian	51.5	.277 8	173 6	792 6	214 8	50 2	37 5.5	3.76 9	1.33 7
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	48	.274 6	217 10	823 8	184 6	63 3	64 9	4.17 3	1.39 3
Cool Beans Chris Malinowski	46	.271 3	190 8	829 9	119 3	82 5	50 8	3.97 6	1.38 4
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	46	.274 5	126 2	601 3	215 9.5	84 6	30 2.5	3.90 8	1.29 10
Drewers Drew Gallagher	40	.269 2	201 9	870 10	174 5	77 4	10 1	4.12 4	1.37 5
Baserobbers Rob Miller	36	.260 1	183 7	688 5	138 4	90 8	39 7	4.22 2	1.42 2
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	33	.271 4	123 1	536 1	115 2	86 7	32 4	4.02 5	1.30 9
Ali Babba & 22 Thieves Nick Ostrowski	21.5	.277 9	151 4	566 2	112 1	31 1	30 2.5	4.43 1	1.43 1

Final 1986 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Cool Beans Chris Malinowski	66	.270 8	151 9	733 11	145 4	87 9	40 6	3.45 9	1.21 10
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	64.5	.262 5	135 7	645 8	179 8	79 7	54 8.5	3.43 10	1.20 11
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	60.5	.276 10	164 10	708 9	221 11	82 8	54 8.5	4.04 2	1.41 2
Drewers Drew Gallagher	59	.260 4	174 11	729 10	211 10	100 11	15 1	3.60 6	1.30 6
Hardbodies Mike Murphy	58	.277 11	147 8	617 7	151 5	71 3	56 10	3.54 7	1.29 7
Baserobbers Rob Miller	52	.257 3	131 6	581 4	87 2	87 10	44 7	3.38 11	1.25 9
The Tubs Tom Gallagher	43	.271 9	117 5	594 6	183 9	54 1	61 11	4.16 1	1.45 1
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	35	.269 7	93 2	590 5	157 6	73 4	25 3	3.63 5	1.35 3
Julestown Labesabs Steve Julian	32	.264 6	102 3	522 3	172 7	59 2	20 2	3.64 4	1.31 5
Ali Babba & 22 Thieves Nick Ostrowski	30.5	.235 1	43 1	332 1	51 1	74 5.5	32 5	3.49 8	1.28 8
Menet Work Scott Menet	27.5	.253 2	114 4	470 2	97 3	74 5.5	27 4	3.71 3	1.31 4

Final 1985 Stats and Standings
		Avg	HR	RBI	SB	W	S	ERA	Ratio
Menet Work Scott Menet	55	.268 4	83 10	334 6	36 2	52 10	13 3	3.33 10	1.26 10
Hardbodies Mike Murphy	52	.285 8	66 5	339 8	54 4	36 5	29 9	3.55 6	1.30 7
Cool Beans Chris Malinowski	47	.269 5	56 4	336 7	58 5	40 8	18 7	3.70 3	1.30 8
The Tubs Tom Gallagher	46	.296 10	68 7.5	345 10	95 9.5	25 1	17 6	4.80 1	1.49 1
Baseball Caps Mike Capilo	46	.287 9	67 6	341 9	68 7	36 5	13 3	3.69 4	1.32 3
Baserobbers Rob Miller	45	.244 1	54 3	254 2	75 8	37 7	19 8	3.52 7	1.28 9
Julestown Labesabs Steve Julian	44.5	.271 7	44 2	284 4	95 9.5	33 3	16 5	3.37 9	1.30 5
Wooden Shoes Tom Holland	44	.269 6	82 9	329 5	33 1	43 9	13 3	3.67 5	1.30 6
Golden Gabes Pete Gabrielli	36.5	.249 2	68 7.5	272 3	67 6	36 5	9 1	3.42 8	1.31 4
Drewers Drew Gallagher	24	.252 3	31 1	172 1	53 3	30 2	31 10	3.96 2	1.40 2